Sudden understanding lit up Eden’s eyes and she was definitely not as drunk as Jos thought. If she was truly drunk, there was no way she would even have dared to kiss her. It wouldn’t have been right.
“You’re worried what people would think if they knew you didn’t like vanilla sex? Umm, you’re a lesbian. You like having sex with women. That’s already not vanilla. In the best way, I mean. What do people think? That the only and best way to get off is missionary? That didn’t and probably never will work for me. If you’re worried about me telling someone, I would never do that.”
“We’re going to be working together. It would be so wrong.”
“That just makes it more exciting.”
Jos rolled her eyes. “Your youth is showing. That’s a very childish way to think about it.”
“Or maybe I’m just a woman who wants another beautiful woman and I don’t care that we’re going to be working together because I can be professional. I can keep a secret, and I sure as hell don’t want my personal life becoming public, so I would never do that to another person. You’ve been on TV for two decades. I’ve been in the public eye since I was born, and my parents are far from celebrities. I know what it’s like to have your every move watched. I’ve fought so hard for everything I’ve wanted. I’ve spent my whole life fighting, whether you believe that or not. You kissed me, Jos, and I’m not going to let that rest. It’s probably best to just get it out of the way.”
“Get it out of the way?” Jos turned to leave, but Eden grabbed her wrist. She spun her around and pulled her against her. She couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe. She couldn’t make herself move away. She couldn’t make herself stop, even though she knew it was wrong.
She’d never wanted anyone the way she wanted Eden. It consumed her. The last shred of her control slipped away as Eden brought her hand to her face and turned her so she had to look at her. So she had to see the raw, naked want in her eyes.
“Yes,” Eden said, her voice thick but not wavering.
Jos had never once in her adult life thought to herself, fuck it. She thought it now. It was dangerous, but she didn’t give a shit about the danger at the moment. All she wanted was this maddening, intoxicating woman in front of her. It didn’t make sense. She couldn’t justify it to herself. She couldn’t explain it, which made it infinitesimally worse, and she still couldn’t stop.
She wrapped a hand around Eden’s shoulder, then slid her fingers higher, until she reached the back of her neck, and she pulled her close. She kissed Eden hard, without sweetness or restraint, and Eden didn’t shy away or gasp in shock or tell Jos that it was too much. She slammed her hands up against Jos’ chest and curled her fingers into her shoulders, hanging on as she plundered her mouth. She even dared to nip at Jos’ bottom lip, whimpering when Jos groaned at the sting.
She thrust her tongue into Eden’s mouth, kissing her furiously, tasting her and drowning in the sheer bliss of it.
“I tried to warn you,” Jos said thickly. She sucked Eden’s bottom lip into her mouth, panting with the restraint
of holding back. “I tried to save you from yourself. No, I tried to save you from me.”
Eden trembled as she pulled back. She looked Jos in the eye, shook her head, and hooked her hands in the hem of the thin camisole, raking it over her head.
She had nothing underneath.
Jos’ mind fractured into a thousand pieces. Eden was perfect. Tight, toned body. Slight curves. She was tall and willowy with the most perfect breasts. Breasts too big for her frame, but still just a perfect handful. Her tight, dark nipples begged for Jos’ mouth. For her fingers. She’d never felt her mouth go so dry. Her panties were soaked, the hot throbbing between her legs an incessant need she couldn’t ignore. She wanted to put her fingers there to ease the ache, but she wouldn’t. She’d deny herself. Because this was going no further.
It was going further.
Eden slipped off the pajama pants in a single movement and stepped back, out of the fuzzy material pooled at her feet. She was a goddess naked. Her skin was pale even though her hair was naturally dark. She was perfect and smooth, and it was obvious she hadn’t given up all of the accoutrements of her past life. Like expensive waxing appointments.
Jos had never seen anyone more beautiful. She felt pale in comparison. The lights were on in the room, but Eden didn’t seem care. She didn’t need to care. She had the confidence of youth. What would she think of Jos’ body if she saw it? Yes, Jos worked her ass off with a personal trainer and killed herself at spin class and did yoga even though she hated it. She hadn’t tasted junk food in twenty years. But still, there were things that she couldn’t do to stop the passing of time, and she no longer looked like that.
She turned on her heel and started down the hallway, surer than ever that what she was doing was a mistake. She wouldn’t be temped. Wouldn’t be lured into a trap. No matter how perfect Eden was, no matter if she never told a soul, they couldn’t. She couldn’t. Jos was panicking because she’d never felt so out of control.
She didn’t expect Eden to follow. Rejection stung and she was sure that she’d take a hint, put her clothes back on, and go the fuck to bed. Alone.
She was wrong.
Eden caught up with her at the door to her room. It was down the hall, far from the guest room, but not far enough. Her small hand closed around Jos’ wrist, yanking her around. Eden was a pillar of fire that landed in Jos’ arms. Her lips were fire, finding Jos’, refusing to let her back down. Refusing to let her take the coward’s way out.
Jos kissed her back. She couldn’t stop herself. She couldn’t stop herself from wheeling them away from the light of the hallway, into the darkness of her room. She flung the door shut and spun Eden, steering her to the bed.
She couldn’t stop kissing her. Couldn’t stop the way she set her on fire. Couldn’t stop the sensations she’d never felt before, the ones that scared her and electrified her and made her feel fully alive when she hadn’t felt that way since she did her first interview.
Eden kissed her deeply, not stopping or pulling away. She buried her hands in Jos’ hair and tugged her down to the bed on top of her. It wasn’t graceful or neat, but it was clear that Eden didn’t want it to be that way. Eden’s hands got bold, daring to touch Jos. She worked her way under the blazer, pushing it from Jos’ shoulders. She struggled, freeing her arms until it was gone. Eden’s hands were everywhere, tracing the lines of her body, her curves, her breasts above the dress. She couldn’t stop tasting Eden’s mouth, warring with her tongue, stroking her, nipping her, swallowing her whimpers as she gave them up to her like an offering. She couldn’t stop.
She was all furious desire between her legs. The throbbing was taking over her common sense, the need in her body shutting down her good judgement. Control? What was control in the face of her all-consuming, overwhelming need?
Jos ripped away and crawled down the length of Eden’s body, feeling as though she was going to fracture into a thousand pieces. She found Eden’s breast in the dark, thumbing her nipple until Eden threw back her head and cried out.
Jos wasn’t gentle, as she promised not to be, but Eden loved it. She loved it so much that when Jos took that nipple into her mouth, suckling the hard bud, scraping her teeth over it then pulling back to pinch it with her fingers again, Eden bucked beneath her. Her hips rose up sharply, and Jos pinned her to the bed with the flat of her hand splayed over her belly.