intrusion on Dani’s privacy, and it would also remind Emily of
the things she didn’t want to ever forget, but also would rather
not think about when she was walking out the door, and maybe
even out of someone’s life.
She opened the door and paused just outside once she’d set
her bags down on the deck. She wanted to talk about what she
owed Dani, but then she thought better of it. Throwing around
talk of money right now would only make both of them feel
worse. Dani was trying to be tough. Emily could tell. She was
trying to make this decision for both of them.
Emily wished she could find something to say to make Dani
change her mind. It was hard, feeling something and not really
knowing if someone else truly felt it too. It was harder
assuming they did and being wrong.
Was she wrong? Emily didn’t know. Dani was right that she
was too inexperienced, both in the past and with Dani herself.
She didn’t really know her. That was the hard truth. She
wanted to, but if Dani wasn’t willing to let that happen, Emily
didn’t want to think about how she’d have to accept it. It was
too painful to wade through all those thoughts.
“I’ll call you in a few days,” she said simply, and closed the
door.
She carted her bags down the steps, leaving behind Dani’s
little apartment with the lace and the colorful rooms and the
TV she always had on with the sound off. She was leaving
behind Mr. Pickles, that ancient, scraggly ball of love, all the
cactuses on the counter, all the furniture from different eras.
She was leaving behind the cookies she’d baked and the nights
they’d shared. She was leaving behind parts of herself she
didn’t even know existed, good parts. Wonderful parts. She’d