That honesty is thanks to tequila.
We sit in silence. It’s not awkward, and I almost wish it were. If it were uncomfortable, it would be easier to get up and walk away. To keep moving through this tour, pretending like it’s no different than any other. The truth is, I owe my career to one person besides myself. I’ve worked hard. I’ve put in the time, the dedication, the drive. And there’s always a certain quota of luck to success—simply being in the right place at the right time.
But I also credit a lot of it to “Heartbreak for Two.”
To Teddy, who inspired that song and reminded me I love to sing.
The bartender reappears. “Can I get you anything else, miss?”
“No. Close out the tab. And add his drink, please.”
He nods before moving away. I stand, wishing I’d worn flats out to dinner. Wishing I were able to slip off my heels and be the sort of the girl who could walk around barefoot without anyone giving a second glance. As it is, I’m hyperaware of how the people around us are probably whispering. Maybe even sneaking photographs.
Teddy looks over at my ensemble—casual on top, party on the bottom—and smirks. I threw on a hoodie and pulled my hair up when I decided to come down here, but I’m still wearing the silk dress and stilettos from dinner at one of Amsterdam’s fanciest eateries.
Wobbly steps take me from the hotel’s bar to the elevator bank. Alcohol swims in my bloodstream, but my not-so-sure footing is just because I’ve never really learned how to walk in heels. The ones I perform in all have special gel insoles these don’t.
I press the button and lean against the wall, waiting for theding.
Teddy appears to the right. He says nothing. Reveals nothing. The doors open. I stumble inside, and he’s right behind me. Next to me. I press the button for the fourth floor.Twice.
“Amelia seems like a nice girl.” I copy his comment earlier about Kyle. The one thatalmostsounded jealous.
The doors reopen on the fourth floor. We start down the hallway, reaching his room first.
“Youhired her,” he reminds me.
I look away, fiddling with the strings of my hoodie. “She’s a good singer. If she’d gotten her heart broken in high school, she’d probably be up front, and I’d be the one in back.”
Teddy half-laughs, half-scoffs. “I’m pretty sure you were the one doing the breaking.”
I end my perusal of the hotel carpet and meet his gaze. “That’s not the name of the song.”
This time, Teddy looks away. “She asked me if I was in love with you.”
“Amelia?”
“Tanya.” He shoves his hands in his pockets. “I didn’t know what to say, andthatprobably said a whole lot. But I also realized it doesn’t matter. Because we’ve never been about what I want. We’ve been what you want. Right, Sutton?”
Once again, tequila loosens my tongue. “We’veneverbeen what I want, Teddy.”
He scoffs in answer before digging into his pocket to pull out the room key. The panel flashes green, and he turns the handle. I should keep walking. Down to the plush suite with all my clothes and a king-size bed to sprawl out on.
But I don’t move. Because, right now, there’s nothing I want more than to walk intothisroom.
It’s not about lust, although I’m experiencing plenty.
I just want to be aroundhim. Ialwayswant to be around him.
My limbs feel loose and my eyelids feel heavy. “Can I stay with you tonight?”
It’s probably the most vulnerable question I’ve ever asked, and it seeps into the words. I’m not asking for sex or love. I just want to sleep in the same bed as him.
In answer, he opens the door and waits.
My room has pajamas and my toothbrush and the bottles that comprise my skin care routine. But it doesn’t have Teddy.
So, I walk straight into the attached bathroom and splash some water on my face before washing it with the hotel-provided bar of soap. There are extra toothbrushes and toothpaste in the drawer. I brush my teeth, use the toilet, and then walk back into the bedroom.