We all laugh, except Kieran, who snarls.
Gowan shakes his head, slathering butter onto toast. “I’ll tell you that I’ve not had a reason to laugh since my wife passed.”
“I’m so sorry,” I murmur.
“We’d the time of our lives. The rascal she left behind wasn’t half the boy my Bren was. Nowadays, he’s selling drugs—drugs.Lord! Fighting in underground matches. I’m sending him to Nan.” Like he’s had a sudden epiphany, Gowan sits back in his chair, suddenly staring off into space for a brief moment. “I’ve been a pure mess. Got a brochure to a private school in England.England.Just to keep him close. But where is he?”
A respectful silence meets Gowan’s question as we all pause from digging in.
“Yes! I’m sending Bren to California. He hates me now, but it’s high time I let go. That’s a piece of advice for the two of you when the time comes.”
Gowan’s warm eyes land on me. “Best wisdom I can offer you, young lady. I’ve no doubt Kier will hurt you. ‘Time is the best healer,’ my wife always said.”
* * *
For the rest of breakfast and the entire day ride to Ireland, Gowan’s parting words warp through my psyche. The advice he had to offer, “When the time comes” jars my core. He was referring to children. Had to be.
Kieran’s sleek Audi SUV zips across the expansive driveway. The majestic, large drooping clusters of wisteria caress the windows.
“Look, tree,” I began, finger rolling around the fine, blossoming vine.
“No, Mommy. Flowwweeerrrr.” Arika pointed a chubby finger as we walked at the Botanical Gardens at The Huntington. Adnan had disappeared, following after the busty tour guide.
“Okay, flower.” I kissed the top of her head. She had an ornery streak like her father. The only difference was hers was set in love. I’d never in a million years dreamt of bringing a child into the middle of our horror story. During my second year in college, Adnan continued to harp that myeducationfilchedourtime. I should’ve known he’d screw with my birth control pills. While he came to regret his next scheme that left me pregnant, the second I saw our little girl, I came to accept one thing:
Icouldtruly be happy in this world.
“Two more weeks, Arika,” I murmured in the tot’s ear. The nineteen-month-old lacked a concept of time, but wise beyond her years, she grinned back.
“Two weeks, Mommy!”
The divorce attorney I’d hired had advised that Adnan would paint me as the villain. The wife who used him for citizenship. She said Adnan might fight for custody to spite me. I revealed that there were multiple documents with the same date and conflicting stories in Adnan's home office. It appeared Adnan had replaced police reports containing humiliating details about a judge’s daughter, a judge I despised and knew intimately because of my husband. My attorney called those documents a violation of ethics and told me to get ahold of them. They were my leverage for freedom. I never planned to use them against Adnan publicly, only in private, so he’d release Arika and me.
Our Arika gave me the strength to leave the devil. I thought if I held Adnan’s sins against him, but never exposed them, Adnan would allow us to leave.
Arika was my life, and I did it all for her. But I was never able to cut the nagging feeling that all the best things never lasted.
40
Kieran
The evening sun glints off the windshield. As I stretch, walking around the front of the SUV to open the passenger door for a slumbering Ava, Kiera skips past me. The lassie slept much of the ride, so she must suspect there’ll be no tongue lashing. My arms drop around my little sister’s shoulder, pulling her near.
“Uh-oh.” She sighs.
“Aye,uh-oh,”I grit near her ear. Pointing a hand at the house, I warn, “Step a single foot outside without a chaperone—”
“The foot in question gets the ax?” She snickers.
“Aye. No morefeckingfoot.”
“Sheesh, I get it,” Kiera groans, taking a few steps, only to be yanked back.
“Here’s my second promise. From this moment forward, I’ll strive to care for you the best way I can. That means no sending you packing or hiding you away. Together, we will figure out your schooling and proper punishment for pissing me off.”
“What?” Kiera does this weird little jump in place movement. Arms slink around the back of my neck, and she kisses my cheeks. A split second later, Kiera busts open Ava’s door as my little bird rouses.
“Guess what!”