“The wound needs cleaning,” I say to Brent. Kayden continues to stare at me, his dark eyes tracing me so noticeably that I feel acutely aware of every movement that I make. “I’m going to take him out back to fix him up.”
“You sure it’s a good idea?” Brent sends me a warning look. I know he means to say more. As in, You sure it’s agood idea being alone with him? After the history you andhim share?
“I’ll be fine,” I assure him.
I don’t know if I’m trying to convince Brent or myself.
***
“Tell me if it hurts.”
“I think I can handle a bit of disinfectant. I’ve been through much worse— Ouch! Motherfucker—”
“Sorry. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
“I’m pretty sure you did that on purpose.”
“Well, I guess you’ll never know, will you?”
He slumps against a wooden stool as I rub the disinfectant carefully over the wound. It’s difficult to concentrate on what I’m doing because his sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, allowing me a prime view of the biceps straining against the fabric. I do eventually manage to pull myself together, cleaning the wound thoroughly and slapping a bandage over it.
We’re on the beach, quite a distance away from the tent. I thought it would be better if we were away from the reception for a while since Brent needs to calm Evans down and the rest of the guests are all in disarray from what occurred.
I dispose of the cotton swab along with the packaging in the tin barrel acting as a makeshift trash can and wipe my hands clean on my bridesmaid dress. “There, you’re done.”
“Thanks.” He smiles faintly at me and my heart melts from the simple expression.
Get your shit together, Sienna! You’re a hot mess whenyou’re around him.
“Are you gonna head back there?” I ask, grabbing the handle of the first aid kit. It feels heavy as I lift it up. Or maybe it’s my strength that’s lacking. Everything feels weird.
My body no longer recognizes itself when it’s around him.
Kayden produces a strained laugh. He fingers the edge of his tuxedo jacket, folded neatly across his lap.
“I don’t think I’m welcome there.”
“Well, you can’t expect to disappear for four months and think that everyone is just going to welcome you with open arms,” I say with a cold shrug. “So, if you want my advice, I think it’s better if you stay here for a while. At least until Brent manages to cool Evans down.”
Kayden grimaces. Musters a tight nod.
Our eyes lock again and I’m overwhelmed by just how many memories come flooding back to me with just a single look. Those same eyes gazing down at me when we first kissed. The playful gleam in them as he tore off my clothing piece by piece until we were nothing but skin on skin. The playfulness melting into sweet tenderness as our bodies joined together in the way we’d been craving. And then knowing that there was no greater feeling, no greater love, than this.
Kayden looks at me, unsmiling. His stare holds me in a tight, unyielding grip. I can’t stand the way he’s looking at me. The way his eyes pry me open. Like he knows I’m trying so hard to hold myself back from him but it isn’t working.
Whyisn’t it working?
“I’m going to put this back.” I force myself to look away as I point to the first aid kit. “And check up on things back at the reception.”
A hand shoots up and clamps down on my wrist.
“No, please,” he breathes, like it hurts for him to do so.
“Please stay.”
I hesitate.
Isn’t that what I’d longed for him to say? And now that he’s saying it, why don’t I feel happy about it at all?