I decided then that I was going to up my game and take Seanan around to all the parks and museums she wanted to go to. I discovered that the little girl loved museums, especially natural history with dinosaurs and wooly mammoths. There were a bunch of animated movies on the subject, and she enjoyed pointing out the different characters.
I had until Sunday to make an impression. Even though I had only one day off per week, I was feeling a little guilty about taking it. If I was her mother, I wouldn’t need a day off. I stopped myself right there. I wasn’t her mother, and as much as I cared for her, I wasn’t being selfish by taking my scheduled breaks. Iwasgoing to make sure she had a lot of fun in the intervening days.
I woke up a little bit early and met the cook in the kitchen. Without asking for permission, I took down two wine glasses and filled them with strawberries. When Seanan woke up, there was a fancy little treat waiting for her at the breakfast table.
The cook wasn’t pleased. She didn’t approve of Seanan touching anything made of glass. I supervised the activity carefully. I didn’t want Seanan to get hurt, either, although I was sure that the cook was more worried about the stemware.
After breakfast, I sprung it on my little friend that we were going out for the day. We both got dressed up and climbed into the back seat of Flynn’s town car. The driver whisked us away into the city. We hit the library and one museum before lunch. After lunch, we spent some time in a park getting our nice clothes dirty.
Coming home, Seanan fell asleep in the car, her head resting on my lap. I smoothed the hair from her face, gazing down at her ridiculously adorable profile. Any woman would be lucky to call Seanan her daughter. I realized with a stab of jealousy that if Seanan had a mother, that would mean that Flynn had a wife.
I wasn’t ready to walk down the aisle, but I didn’t want him to be off the market. I was already starting to think of all of them as my men. They were each my lovers, having spent intimate hours with both Connor and Flynn. I didn’t want to give any of them up, and I didn’t care how that sounded.
When we arrived back home, I picked Seanan up. She was heavy, but I could manage. I took her all the way upstairs and laid her down in her bed. Removing her jacket and shoes, I tucked her gently under the covers.
Nap time was my own time, and I went back downstairs to read. It was a good day that was followed by another good day. We went to see a movie, one of the newest releases that Seanan was dying to see. We called up Chloe and April and invited them out. The four of us ate popcorn and drank sodas as we watched the cartoon animals prance around on the big screen. Afterwards, we all went out to eat at McDonalds.
It was funny; Seanan was rich enough to dine at only the most well reviewed restaurants, but like any kid, she preferred greasy fries. I relaxed my dietary guidelines so that she could enjoy a hamburger. Taking her home that afternoon, I realized that we hadn’t eaten well all day. I made sure that the cook was offering something healthy for dinner and loaded Seanan up with vegetables.
She ate them like a champ. I figured that her little body was craving vitamins after a day of junk food. We curled up on the couch and read a picture book before Flynn got home. He was evasive, more so than usual.
I greeted him at the door, not offering a kiss but holding out my hands to take his jacket. I couldn’t let anyone know that our relationship had progressed beyond the mere professional one we’d had in the beginning. There was still the cook to contend with, and Seanan didn’t need to know that her father and I were getting closer.
Flynn put Seanan to bed as he sometimes did when he arrived home in time. I poured him a drink, and we sat talking late into the evening. It was warm and comforting. His gruff exterior was melting away slowly but surely. I was treated to an inside glance at his heart, and I loved it. I told him my secrets, and he shared some of his.
And yet, I had a feeling that there was something he wasn’t telling me. He didn’t kiss me or make any moves. It was almost as if our wild encounter in his office hadn’t happened. And yet, our friendship was blossoming.
At the end of the night, I took the initiative and kissed him goodnight. He wasn’t rude, but the passion that had ruled his first demanding embrace was absent. I felt like I was kissing a good friend instead of a conquering warlord. It made me happy, but oh so curious. What was it that he was keeping from me? Why was he being so circumspect?
I went to bed that night imagining all the things that might be going through his mind. Did he know what I had planned for Sunday? Did he care? He said that we would figure out what to do about Connor and Declan. Maybe he had made some decision that he didn’t want to clue me in on just yet.
The following day, I took Seanan shopping. I asked for Flynn’s card as per his request. We started out in the mall, visiting clothing stores to find a new dress. She quickly got bored with that activity, so we moved on to more exciting things like toys.
We spent two hours in one toy store. She wandered up each aisle, touching all the little plastic people, driving cars, and investigating boats. There were puzzle books and craft projects that we considered. I let her set the pace and hung back until she asked for my advice. I noticed a few other parents in the store doing the same thing. It was a little kids’ paradise, and we were just observers.
Seanan finally decided on a new doll. This one had a computer chip in it that would allow it to walk. There were also hair extensions so that when you cut the doll’s hair, it could grow back. I had never seen Seanan express an interest in cutting hair before, but she seemed to be particularly excited about that feature.
After purchasing the doll, I was able to coax her into a few more clothing shops. We picked up a hoodie sweatshirt, two T-shirts, and a pair of shoes. All in all, it was a good haul, and we returned home exhausted and satisfied.
Tucking her in for her nap, I could see the love in her eyes. It was exactly what I had been hoping for. I wanted to express my affection, and I could see that she understood. She was very important to me, growing more so each day. I didn’t want to think about a time that I wouldn’t be in her life. She had everything she could ever want, but the most important thing, a real mother, was missing.
She deserved better. She deserved to have two doting parents who would take her on trips just for fun. If I didn’t need the money and the excuse for living in Flynn’s home, I would do it all for free. She was worth that much.
Returning to my own room, I lay down on top of the blankets. It wasn’t just that I was able to support Seanan, but she gave me the attention and affection I craved as well. Back home in America, there had only been Nan. I’d enjoyed every minute I spent with my grandmother, but it wasn’t the same. Here in Ireland, I had everything I wanted. I had three gorgeous men and the beginnings of a real family.
CHAPTERTWENTY
FLYNN
It was Saturday night. I returned home from work to find Seanan and Bre sitting on the couch. They were watching Seanan’s television show but turned it off when I walked in the door. I scooped Seanan up, pleased to see that she was happy.
She had nothing but good things to say about everything she had been doing with Bre. In the past week, I noticed that Bre had been taking my daughter out around town, showing her the city and all the fun stuff for children to do. When I put Seanan down for the night, she chirped excitedly about the mall and about all the clothes they’d bought. She showed me a new doll, explaining all the nuances and features like a tech nerd highlighting the latest Apple watch.
I helped her into bed, pulling the covers up to her chin. Kissing her on top of her head, I wondered how I had gotten so lucky. Breanna was becoming more important to both of us by the day. I went downstairs to find her, thinking I could enjoy another evening in her company.
I could see living with Bre for a long time. She was becoming a mother figure to Seanan and a love interest for me. It was the perfect combination, and it felt right. I wanted to stake my claim, to make sure that she would be around for years or even decades. But first I had to iron things out with Connor and his friend.
I knew that they were both also important to Bre, and I was determined to find a way for us all to peacefully coexist. On Monday, I would confront her other lovers and see if we could iron out a deal.