I’ll let her and Beau have a little time together while I attend to some business I’ve been neglecting. In fact, I should go do that right now. There are contracts on my desk that I can review. Proposals that need attention.
“Here it is,” Beau cries. His little arm is outflung like he’s some salesman exhibiting the latest goods.
Lila is stuck in the doorway. “This…is all for me?”
The room is not red and blue but a classy mix of pale greens, yellows, and pinks. The decorator called it Monet-inspired.
“It’s like a painting,” Beau explains. He was with me when I made all the decisions. I’m surprised at how neatly he’s become part of my life. Everyone now knows I have two wards, and when I have meetings, I’m often given gifts for them. Lila’s range from dolls to electronics while Beau has every Lego set known to man.
“It’s beautiful.” Her eyes glow when she looks at me.
It makes my clothes tight and the back of my neck itch. Feelings swirl around that I shouldn’t have. I step back until I’m out of the room. Hurt flickers across her face, and part of me wants to reach out and crush her to me, but that’s the part that needs to be shut down, excised, thrown away.
Resolutely, I ignore the pain I’ve inflicted and give her an abrupt nod. “You’re welcome to change anything you don’t like.”
Beau tugs at Lila’s arm. “You won’t change anything, will you? We worked very, very hard on this. We had to make a lot of decisions. It took a long time. Drix said we had to get it right.”
“Did he?” She sounds so uncertain, so hopeful. The glow is starting to creep back in.
“If I didn’t, I’d be accused of mistreating you, which would be bad for business,” I bite out tersely.
Her face grows stone cold. “And everything is about what’s good for the business, like when you found us in your basement and couldn’t have anyone else know.”
“That’s right,” I fire back. “Remember that. You’re a Mason now. Don’t do anything to embarrass me.” With those unnecessarily cruel words, I turn and leave, not wanting to see what wounds I’ve inflicted. Not wanting to acknowledge that my own needs are turning me into an unrecognizable bastard.