chapter five
Olivia
I hate to admit it, but even though Ajax doesn’t let me go anywhere without him and keeps me basically holed up inside wherever the hell we are, I don't feel like a captive. He stays with me the entire time, talking to me, helping me find myself.
He asks me pointed questions about my likes and dislikes, and it's reminiscent of when I used to sneak out to talk to him. The only thing is now we're not having to look over our shoulders so that my parents don't discover it.
And despite the hungry way his eyes rove over me, he hasn’t so much as kissed me again, though every night he sleeps with his arms banded around me like steel, and I can feel his huge erection pressing against my ass.
But he doesn't try anything. I don’t know if he's leading me into a false sense of security before he makes his move or if he's genuinely trying to make me comfortable, or if he's just trying to drive me insane.
He doesn't even have to touch me for my body to start burning with desire. All he has to do is gaze at me with that look in his eyes, and I feel like I'm going to spontaneously combust.
In three days, my defenses start to come down. I forget to be angry with him. I find myself laughing at things he says more. I start appreciating the way his eyes crinkle in the corners when he smiles after having made me laugh.
I remember now why I used to sneak out to talk to him. Ajax is fascinating. He makes me laugh, and he really listens to me. I don't think anyone has ever seen me the way he does. He notices every little thing about me. Things I never noticed about myself—like the way I let my hair hang down in front of my shoulder to hide my face when I become uncomfortable. I never realized I did that until he told me I did.
And we have the same taste in movies. Every night he puts on an old black-and-white film. We watch them together, getting lost in the magic of another time.
It's amazing how comfortable I am with him. My mouth drops open in wonder whenever he finally takes me outside and I see that we're in a little cabin in the woods. The interior of the cabin is modern, yet the outside looks so rustic. Judging by the inside of the house, though, I never would have guessed we were in a cabin in the middle of the freaking woods.
I would have thought we were in any house in the city, but no. We're in a wooded area, and again, that's something that should scare me because we look to be off the grid. There's no one around in sight, yet I find it peaceful instead.
We sit on the hanging swing on his porch and listen to the birds chirp and the bees hum. Ajax even shows me how to make sugar water to go in the hummingbird feeder he has hanging up on his front porch, and we sit there and watch the hummingbirds drink the nectar from the feeder.
I’m startled to admit that I can see myself spending the rest of my life like this—with Ajax, his arm draped behind me on the big swing as I sit next to him.
Against my better judgment, I allow myself to relax and lean my body against the crook of his arm. Ajax stills for a moment, but then I feel his big hand on my shoulder as he pulls me in to settle me closer to him. I feel the pleasure wafting off of him, and it humbles me to know that my presence can make him so happy.
I see the adoring way his eyes follow every move I make, and it causes my stomach to flutter with a thousand tiny butterflies.
I still feel the way I did the first time I ever talked to him. Ajax might be a felon. He might seem dangerous to the rest of the world, but he would never hurt me.
That's why I finally get up the courage to ask him what he was sent to prison for.
We're sitting on the swing, and I'm laying with my head in the crook of his neck when I pop the question.
His body tenses, but I don't take it back. I think if he thought it was okay to watch me without my knowledge and to kidnap me, then the least he can do is share his history with me. I'm not going to judge him. I just want to know more about the man whom I’m spending so much time with. He knows basically everything there is to know about me now. It's only fair I know more about him, and I’m prepared to argue that if he doesn't want to open up.
Ajax is quiet for a long moment before he finally sighs and speaks, “I had a little sister.”
My heart instantly clenches for him at his use of the past tense—had. I don't interrupt him, though I'm burning with questions already. I let him tell it at his own pace.
“She was beautiful, smart, funny. Everyone loved her. She saw the good in everyone.” His eyes flick down at me and soften. “Kind of like you do.”
Then he looks back up, gazing out into nothing as he goes on, his jaw hardening, “She was trusting—too trusting—and that trusting nature of hers ultimately got her in trouble. She trusted the wrong person, and he raped her.” His voice becomes gravelly before he clears it and goes on, “He raped her and beat her so badly that she didn't survive the attack.”
I feel his hand tightening on my shoulder. I can practically feel the pain radiating off him. It’s still raw, and I want so much to take it away, to ease it for him.
“The police couldn't find out who did it, so I did their job for them. I found out who did it, and when I did, I took vengeance into my own hands.”
“You didn't go to the police with the information?” I surmise.
His jaw clenches. “Why would I? The incompetent fuckers couldn't figure out who did it. I certainly didn't trust them to see justice done. Too many criminals have slipped through the cracks with a good lawyer, and this guy,” Ajax snorts, “he was rich. One of the upper crust. He definitely would have had a good lawyer. He'd have probably skated free, and I couldn’t have that. I wasn't going to leave anything to chance, so I took care of it myself.”
“You killed him,” I say it, so he doesn't have to.
He gives a curt nod before he meets my eyes. “I'm not gonna lie to you, Olivia. I don't regret it. In fact, I wish I could dig him back up, bring him back to life, and kill him all over again.”