It would have been nice if he had informed me of that.
“I don’t have to move back to the city at all, Dad,” my voice was steel when I laid the last of my hand down, knowing it was about the only thing I did have to threaten. While he had been supporting me, I excelled at school and could have made other plans which didn’t involve the city.
“Lily,” his sigh was full of exasperation, but I knew I had him in that moment. “Fine,” he snapped, “but I am going to be the one to pick your building so it has the security I require in order to be able to sleep at night if you won’t come back home to me.”
For a split second, guilt filled me. In so many ways I was the only thing dad had left and the same was true about him for me. Mom died right after giving birth to me, so it was only us my entire life. When I was a little girl, he tried to make time for me. I think.
I remember him sitting in his expensive suit and having a tea party with me a few times. That’s something. I guess.
He spoiled me, but he also made me work for everything I got. Toys weren’t given for free unless it was my birthday or Christmas. Otherwise, I had to barter and negotiate the other things I wanted.
I think it gave me a good work ethic, even though, in many ways, I’m still the sheltered little girl I was growing up. If I hadn’t gone to school, I don’t think I would have ever met a boy before I went off to college. Not like I had much luck with boys back then, but still.
Not having to look for a place and knowing Dad would throw money at the problem if there was any, I was able to agree to his terms. Now with him gone, I wonder if it would have made any difference if I had gone back home.
When my doorman, a huge guy who would look more appropriate in front of a club as a bouncer, opens the door for me, his eyes scan my outfit as I leave my building. I try and hide my smile because I know I look good. I might have preferred to stay at home and study than go out while I was in school, but that doesn’t mean I don’t know how to dress the part.
“Ma’am,” he nods his head and takes another look at me. “Where are you headed to?” He flashes me a smile, but it’s pleasant and not oily. It’s almost a shame he’s my doorman because he’s quite handsome.
It’s been a while since I’ve gotten some gratification and I wouldn’t turn it down. Hell, it would probably help me relax a little. A little voice in my head is telling me a quickie with my doorman would not win me any favors with Constantino.
“Just going out to blow off some steam,” I words are polite, but my tone is a little breathless.
I’m going to chalk it up to Constantino. Thinking of him always gets me going. Which is probably a bad sign.
I pull my shoulders back and do what I always do—fake it ‘til I make it. It’s what I’ve been doing my entire life and I have a feeling I’m going to need to call on that skill tonight.
When I hop in a cab to take me to Sala, my thoughts drift to Constantino. I have no doubt he’ll be at his club tonight. I hope it won’t be too difficult to see him. My palms start sweating with the realization that I don’t have an appointment and I could be turned away immediately because of it.
No.
I take a deep breath and let it out slowly. I’m a Scavo, and not just any Scavo, I’m the daughter of Giovanni. His name carries weight around here, even while his soul is, hopefully, at peace.
If Constantino doesn’t want to speak to me, then he won’t. If he’s the second most powerful man in the city, only behind his brother Elio, then walking into the lion’s den is probably not the best idea.
If only I had any other plan. If only I knew what I would be negotiating to get the help I need.
Maybe my father did prepare me for this.