CHAPTER 6
LILY
You know the saying ‘heavy is the head that wears the crown’? Well, it comes from Shakespeare and originally it was uneasy and not heavy. Do I have a soft spot for some of the fucked-up things Shakespeare found a way to bring to light in a way which transcends time? Absolutely.
I thought for sure I knew what that phrase meant, whether it’s heavy or uneasy. I thought I did because I knew my role in terms of what my father expected of me. After graduating and having my eyes opened more to what my father’s world was about, I felt that heaviness. I felt the crown.
It has nothing on the feeling of Constantino Agosti’s engagement ring on my finger. Not just because of the size of the rock on this thing, which is substantial, but because of everything it entails.
More than that, it’s the way he looks at me sometimes. It’s heavy, like the ring. There’s so much promise there. So much expectation.
I’ve never been one not to meet a challenge head on, but with Constantino, it feels bigger, like it’s more. He’s spun so many glorious words together, much like Shakespeare, which make me feel seen and understood, wanted and claimed.
I’m not sure if I can trust it or not. There is a part of me which does and wants to jump in with both feet, not giving a damn if we drown in the depths of this thing between us. Is that just the naïve part of me? I don’t know and it scares me as much as the feelings Constantino yanks out of me.
Right now, his hand is resting on my thigh as he drives me to his older brother Elio’s home. Yeah, Elio, the current head of the Agosti family. When Constantino asked…told…bargained with me to marry him, I knew I would have to meet more of his family, but meeting Elio only a few days after moving into Constantino’s place, which he calls ours, makes me feel like my stomach is a hornet’s nest of anxiety.
I should be afraid of their power. I should be afraid of walking into the lion’s den. I should be afraid that they’ll simply kill me and take the Scavo territory and business by force.
I’m not scared of those things.There’s been so much sincerity in Constantino’s eyes when he’s told me I’m his. I can almost believe him, almost trust him, almost hope his words are true. I don’t think he would let me come to harm, which is probably incredibly stupid, but it is what it is.
What I’m scared of is that they won’t like me and won’t approve of Constantino being with me.
Which is ridiculous.
“What are you thinking about so hard over there?” I jump in my seat and press a hand to my chest in surprise, so deep in thought that hearing Constantino’s deep voice shocked the fuck out of me. There’s amusement in his voice, “I swear I can hear the gears turning in your gorgeous head.”
I should hide my truth from him. I shouldn’t show any vulnerability. It’s why I was dressed like seeing Constantino again was a business meeting on the day I knew he’d show up for me. I thought it would help me keep some distance. He’s ripped that away from me and held me close instead.
I blush thinking about how close he held me earlier after I stepped out of the bathroom and was about to get dressed for dinner. He paused with putting his cufflinks in, his turquoise eyes roving over my body filled with heat.
The next thing I knew, I was laid out on the bed, my towel being tugged open while he took me in. I almost combusted when he kneeled on the floor and whispered reverently against my thigh as he peppered my skin with kisses, “So soft,Gattina.” His eyes turned mischievous, and his wicked mouth drifted up higher, closer to where I wanted him. “You look nervous, I’m going to help you relax and then I’m going to help you get dressed.”
Yeah, he relaxed me alright. With his tongue buried in my pussy and his thumb rubbing my clit. He relaxed me right into two orgasms. I was boneless there for a little while and if he hadn’t helped me get dressed, I would have been content to roll over and go to sleep.
He even brushed my hair. Have you ever had a man brush your hair with careful, precious strokes? Would recommend and go back for more.
Constantino’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts, and I realize I never answered him the first time, “Are you nervous?”
I swallow hard and try and paint on my unaffected mask, the one I’ve had to wear most of my life. It’s hard to keep it in place around this man though. My man? It’s hard to believe that is true as well.
“A little,” I huff out. When we sit in silence for a few minutes, it feels oppressive as fuck. I know he wants me to elaborate. I’m seriously contemplating if I can, or if I shouldn’t, or if I even know why I’m nervous in the first place. It’s a mess in my head and I blurt, “What if they don’t like me?”
Constantino, to his fucking credit, doesn’t laugh. He glances over at me, into my horror-stricken eyes at having admitted such a thing and gives my thigh a squeeze. There’s no question in his voice, no hesitation in his words, “They’re going to love you, Lily, because there is so much to love about you. They are going to accept you because they will see very quickly how much you mean to me and that I won’t be letting you go.”
Well, damn. I don’t think Shakespeare had anything on Constantino Agosti. At least not in this moment. Between his constant contact and his words, I feel a lot lighter for the rest of the drive and my stomach only clenches agonizingly for a moment when we pull up. I’m going to take it as a win.
I manage to get my shit together by the time Constantino opens the door for me, my mask in place. Somewhat. For the most part.
I’ve worn it before, and I got damn good at it. This feels different though, bigger, and I think it’s the reason it’s more difficult for me to keep everything together.
I have this need for them to like me, to accept me. Which is silly because, even though Constantino says the right words, there is part of me which doubts all of this is real. He wants me? Why? I bet he could have any woman in the city between his good looks, connections, and worth.
Constantino doesn’t stop to knock, looking at me with a smirk when he opens the door and leads me inside with his hand on the small of my back. The moment I step inside, I’m taken aback by the grandeur in the home. I shouldn’t be. It’s not like I’m a stranger to riches, but the Agosti mansion is something else. It drips money.
There’s a screech from somewhere deeper in the house and I freeze. Was it a screech of fear? Pain? What the hell am I walking into?
Constantino chuckles next to me, his voice full of warm amusement, “That would be Daisy.”