"No," Maia agreed, Zamanya's face flashing behind her eyes. The hate she hadn't been able to hide would stay with Maia for a long time. "So what do I do?"
"What do you enjoy doing if you're not using your power or training to fight?"
Maia snorted. "Drinking myself to darkness."
"Mm," Ark replied, nudging her with a smile. "I've heard of your escapades, my highness. What else?"
"Right now, sex is pretty great."
Ark groaned, and certain parts of Maia tightened and paid extremely close attention to where his hands rested on her body. "Other than that."
Maia forced herself to put down her defence mechanism and be serious for a second. "I loved the library before my aunt burned it down. Not just reading, but being around the librarians, spending time in a place like that—old, peaceful, full of history."
Now it was nothing but a skeleton and ash. All her beloved rooms blackened, her favourite books turned to cinders, her attic room razed to nothing. But not before Ismene had plundered her research.
The queen wouldn't give up—in her pursuit of Azorher hunt of Maia. Etziel would be sent after them, and Maia had no doubt he'd find them. She shuddered, and Ark growled low in his throat, a sound of pure fae instinct that made Maia limp.
The dominance in it wrapped around her, and for once she wasn't resentful of her submissive fae nature; not if it made her feel this safe. Ark might have been a civilised guard with twenty years of training, but she knew he'd rip out the throats of her enemies with his teeth if she was in danger, and it was a heady thing.
The darkness that had clung to Maia for the past half hour lifted, and she could breathe again.
"You'll make sure I don't hurt anyone?"
"I will," he vowed, as serious as a fire storm. "And I'll find you a new sanctuary, my highness."
Maia wasn't sure she deserved someone as good as Ark, but she was so fucking glad she had him in her life.
"Thank you, Arkie," she said with absolute sincerity, rewarded with a huff of laughter.
He squeezed her waist. "Talk to your other mates, too. You're not alone in this, Maia; don't keep your struggles to yourself."
"Can't I just drown them in booze and sex like any other well adjusted person?" she asked, blinking owlishly at her overprotective mate.
"No," he replied firmly, laying a kiss on her cheek before pushing her off his lap and standing.
"Spoil sport," she teased, sticking her tongue out at him.
"Don't tempt me to put that tongue to use," he warned, and a thrill lanced through Maia's body.
She shot him a thoroughly delighted look, drawing a groan from her mate as he stood. But he resisted the dark, smoky look she trailed down his body and squeezed her shoulder, leaving to find her a substitute for her library.
Maia didn't hold out much hope; nothing could ever replace the Library of Vennh. But she'd take any scrap of solace right now. She couldneverlose control of her snaresong again. She didn't know who she'd hurt next if she did.