I shrug.
“What?”
He pauses, grins, then leans in close to me, speaking very slowly.
“I was thinking about what it would be like to feel your body on mine, without all these people around.”
I feel a shiver run up my spine, but within it is something else I usually don’t recognize. It’s a feeling of annoyance that he would just expect sex from me. It isn’t that I don’t want to- I’ve had great times with one-night stands. But tonight?
I realize that he’s waiting for me to respond. His eyes are shining, and that grin is still painted on his face. I lean away from him, spinning the straw in my drink.
I think about saying yes. A good night of sex might take my mind off of Amanda’s news and feeling like a useless piece of shit. But there’s something about tonight that’s putting me off.
It’s my turn to shoot my drink down and make a run for it. I do so, then lean in to respond.
“I don’t think that’s going to work for me tonight.”
He frowns, looking clearly disappointed. Reaching out for my hand, he starts caressing it. He’s attractive and tempting- but I feel like I’ve made up my mind.
After a second, he leans forward to whisper in my ear again.
“I think you’d enjoy it more than you think.”
I pull away before he gets the chance to say anything else. I push my drink away and mouth an apology to him. Before I can see his reaction, I grab my purse and turn away.
It’s difficult to get through the crowd while the music pumps, and a sickly feeling crawls through my stomach.
A part of me thinks that he’ll follow me through the people, as he seems like the playboy type. But I don’t have the patience for that tonight.
I’m thinking about Amanda, and how everyone else is managing to get their lives together but me. I feel tears roll down my cheeks as I escape into the outside world.