“I just wanted to check in, see how you’re holding up. We haven’t talked much either and I want to make sure… I don’t know.”
“You can just say you missed me.”
Andrew laughs.
“Okay, I missed you. Did you miss me?”
“A little,” I say with a chuckle.
Another pause falls between us, and I can hear him shuffling awkwardly around his apartment.
“Seriously, Dylan… where are you with this whole thing?”
This time, it’s my turn to laugh.
“The answer you get right now will change in a moment; I guarantee you. I’m everywhere right now. I mean, first you and I- and now this? It’s like, I’m confused and disappointed in us- but worst of all, I hate how much we hurt her.”
“Yeah, I do too.”
“How about you?” I ask.
“Where are you at?”
The shuffling on the other end of the line freezes, but only for a moment, like he didn’t expect me to ask him how he’s doing.
“I miss her. I’ve been trying to imagine what life without her would be like and I can’t. I can’t imagine it.”
“This whole thing is making me realize that I don’t want to lose her. She’s too amazing.”
Andrew isn’t responding. He’s breathing and his breath is shaky.
“Andrew?”
“Are we going to be okay if she leaves us?”
“What do you mean?” I ask.
“I mean, you and I. Do you think we can just go back to being friends? Is that even a possibility?”
I’ve been wondering that myself, but I don’t want to tell him. He’s already worried enough. Something about Andrew makes me want to be strong for him.
“We’ll be fine. You’re my co-pilot.”
I wonder if he can hear my smile the way I can hear his.
“I believe you’remyco-pilot.”
“Maybe we should change our game to pilot points. That way you can finally learn that I’m the pilot and you’re the co-pilot.”
“Will you stop making me laugh at times like this? I honestly don’t deserve to be laughing right now.”
That comment hits me in my gut. He’s right.
“I suppose I don’t either.”