A moment of silence follows. Then all hell breaks loose.
“Seriously? You’re gonna bring that up? When are you going to get over that?!”
“How can I? How can I get over what you did to me when you’re everywhere I go?”
My throat feels sore, like that feeling you get when you know you’re about to cry but you hold it in. Because right now, facing Darian, talking about what he did to me all those years ago- all I want to do is cry, and scream. But I can’t. I can’t show him even an ounce of weakness.
“Oh, and you think I want to seeyou? You think it isn’t hard for me too??”
“Why would I care how you feel? After you so blatantly didn’t care how I felt?”
“Okay, you keep bringing this up- so obviously you want to talk about it. So shoot. What is it that you think I did to you?”
“Oh don’t be condescending. You know exactly what you did.”
“Refresh my memory.”
God, this guy is so infuriating. Is he trying to make this worse? Does he want me to relive what happened?
My first instinct is to just walk out of here right now. But then I think about what Becky would want me to do. I think about the fact that if we don’t talk about this- things between us and Becky won’t last very long. So I stay.
“Peter, you’re the one who slept with Vanessa after I already had,” he says.
“You think that’s what this is about? Do you honestly think that’s it?”
I stare him down as I begin walking towards him.
“I slept with Vanessa because when I walked in on the two of you going at it- I washeartbroken. I’ve never felt something that painful in my entire life. Do you understand that? Does this make sense to you now?!”
By the end of my sentence, I’m shouting. Darian winces, but I don’t care.
“I left our dorm that night feeling like someone had just ripped a giant whole through my chest. I couldn’tbreathe. All because ofyou. What I did after that wasnothingcompared to that feeling. And if I’m being honest- I should have done way worse.”
Now we’re practically nose to nose.
“So I’m going to ask you again Darian. Do you honestly think that my anger towards you is about some dumb sorority chick?”
Darian stares at me, speechless. I can feel his breath on my face, and I’m about to turn away and storm out of his office, until he grabs me.
His hand wraps around the back of my neck, and his other hand around to the small of my back. And before I even have time to think, his lips touch mine.
There is one single moment of pure shock. But one second later, that feeling is replaced by need. Pure, animalneed. I kiss him back, fiercely, pushing him into the wall behind him.
Our lips smash together, clinging at any and all skin they can reach. Our hands mimic our lips, gripping each other's bodies, as if we’re lovers and one of us just came back from the war.
It feels good, it feels powerful. So powerful, that I completely forget about all the reasons I’ve been hating him all these years. That is, until he pulls away, leaving my lips tingling and even hungrier than before.
I open my eyes, confused, searching his for an explanation. And that’s when I realize what just happened.