I peeked my head inside. Each room was bigger than the living room in my apartment, and at least twice the size of my bedroom. There were queen-sized beds and large dressers for guests, but I could imagine his future children loving the space they'd have to run around and store all their toys.
His kids would probably be cute. I'd seen a photo of Gwen at the studio. She was a gorgeous blonde, with emerald green eyes that almost caught you off guard with how bright they were. And her heart-shaped face endeared you to her immediately.
Drew had always gone for blondes, so Gwen was the total package as far as I could tell. Their kids would hit the genetic jackpot with parents as attractive as they were.
Drew cleared his throat, breaking my thoughts away from his future family. "My room is down this way." He gestured back the way we'd come. We walked past the staircase, past a huge game room and another sitting area. Eventually, we came to a set of double doors.
Drew opened one of the large doors to reveal the room inside.
I just hovered in the doorway at first, taking in the luxury that he got to experience every day. Grayish-brown wood flooring lined the room. Off to one side was a small sitting area with a couch, coffee table, fireplace, and TV.
Farther back were more double doors that led to a balcony.
I looked the other way and saw a king-sized bed, and behind that was another door that I assumed led to the master bath and closet area.
"I promise to be a complete gentleman. You can walk inside and not have to worry about Nolan needing to beat me up afterward." He winked, and my heart banged in my chest. I knew I didn't have to worry about Drew making a pass at me. But it still seemed surreal to step into such a private area. He slept in here. He relaxed in here. Showered in here.
Maybe did other activities in here.
I cleared my throat and stepped inside the suite. Maybe talking about his girlfriend would remind my heart that it wasn’t supposed to race when it thought about things like that. "So did you and Gwen hit it off right from the start? Or was it more of a slow burn?” I asked, hoping to come off sounding neutral about the whole thing.
"Um, I don't know.” Drew scrubbed his hand through his hair. “It was different. She was beautiful, so I noticed that right off, but we didn't really click until later.” He shrugged. “I actually almost sent her home that first night. I was pretty sure about twelve of the women when it came time to decide who to keep and who to let go, but I couldn't make up my mind about the last three.”
“Really?” I asked, surprised he’d almost sent his final pick home.
He nodded. “This is where the producers came in handy. They'd taken the time to get to know me pretty well, and they'd had a chance to talk with the girls…probably more than I did. So when Dion named Gwen as a good choice, I followed his intuition."
Dion did seem to have a good read on people. "Thank goodness for Dion."
"I know, right? To think I could have sent her home that first night. That would have made this season even more of a mess."
I ran my fingers along his white comforter, unable to resist discovering if it felt as soft as it looked. "So what kept you from taking the final step that last day in Antigua?" What had kept Drew back from proposing? "You're still dating now, right?" I looked up through my lashes just in time to see him swallow and nod. "Then why not just do it then? It's what the show is all about, isn't it?"
A tortured look crossed Drew's face and I instantly regretted bringing it up. I was about to tell him it was none of my business when he said, "I don't know.” He released a heavy sigh. “There was just something that wasn't there between us, and I couldn't tell her that I saw us being together forever. You know?" He paused. "And part of me still didn't trust that the girls were really there for me and not my money. Plus, I had vowed to myself that I wouldn't make any promises I couldn't keep. I didn't want to lead anyone on. And I only wanted to get engaged once."
I tried to keep my face neutral at his mention of wanting a one-time engagement. What would he think of me when he found out I'd not only gotten engaged to someone and not had it work out, but went all the way and gotten married?
He'd think I was some flimflam-y girl who jumped in and out of relationships at the drop of a hat.
Drew continued, "I knew my heart wasn't there yet, so I couldn't promise something I wasn't sure of myself. Hopefully I’ll be ready ten weeks from now, because ready or not, I guess I'm gonna have to man up and do it. I just need to talk to Gwen about everything so she understands what's going on. I'd hate to lead her on just for the sake of saving the show."
And I couldn't help but admire Drew for how sincere he was being about this whole thing. Most bachelors would be totally fine going through the motions even if the feelings weren’t all the way there. But it was obvious that this was so real to Drew.
He did everything with the purest of intentions. And I was even more determined to make sure that he was happy when everything was said and done. I'd do my job the best I could, but I'd also make sure Drew's heart didn't get hung out on the line.
I peeked inside the bathroom and closet before leaving. Just like I expected, they were gorgeous and had everything I'd ever dreamed of in a billionaire's bathroom.
There was a huge soaking tub in the middle of the room, and a separate shower and toilet area. Double sinks so he wouldn't have to worry about his future wife's stuff cluttering up his side. And his closet… I literally gasped when I stepped inside. It had drawers and cupboards, and a washer and dryer. There was a big round cushioned seat in the middle that he could sit on to put on his shoes.
And even if he said he wasn't ready to get married yet, his closet told me otherwise. It was only half full. Less than halfway full, actually. He'd left plenty of space for his future bride to put her things.
And seeing how thoughtful Drew already was made my heart kind of hurt. I wasn't necessarily jealous of his future wife since I knew I’d never had a chance with Drew back when I’d wanted it, but I was jealous that while Drew had already put so much thought toward a future with his soon-to-be bride, Nolan hadn't even cared to have one with me.
Why had I not seen the signs earlier?
How had I let myself marry a guy who didn’t really love me?
I sighedand switched off the light to the closet and went back into the bedroom and found Drew sitting on his bed.