“In the flesh,” I say. “Can we go talk somewhere?” I ask. Jameson and Colby look around the room.
“Colby, did I ever show you the new tires on my truck?” Jameson asks with a pointed look on his face.
“Yeah, man. Last week,” Colby answers. My poor brother is clueless.
“Oh good. You get to look at them again,” Jameson says, grabbing Colby’s shirt sleeve and leading him from the room. He closes the door behind them, and then it’s just me and Seth in the room. He watches me expectantly, waiting for me to make the first move. My throat is suddenly very dry, and it feels like it’s closing up.
“I’m going to go get some water,” I say. I turn right out of the living room, and Seth catches me by the arm with a crooked grin on his face.
“Kitchen’s this way,” he says as he guides me in the opposite direction. I’ve never been inside his house before. I glance around at my surroundings, and to my surprise, his house is nicer than I thought it would be. For some reason, I’ve always pictured the quintessential bachelor’s pad in my head: tacky movie posters, rumpled couch, mattress on the floor, trash scattered everywhere. But this is a nice surprise. Everything is clean and tidy. His furniture looks fairly new and stylish, and I’d be willing to bet he had his mom pick it out. There isn’t much in the way of decoration, but that’s to be expected.
We walk into the kitchen, and I immediately start rummaging through his cabinets, looking for a glass. After the fifth wrong cabinet, Seth says, “Above the dishwasher.”
“Very logical spot,” I say as I walk over to the cabinet and pull out a glass. I fill it with water and chug it quickly. All the while, Seth’s probing eyes are glued to me. I set my glass down on the counter and say, “Can we sit?”
He nods his head, and we sit down at his small table together. He’s still watching me, still waiting for me to tell him why I’m here. “So, you have something on your mind,” he prompts me.
The air rushes out of my lungs in a whoosh. What was it that Millie and Tess told me to say? I should have written it down on my hand. But my hands are so sweaty right now it would have rubbed off by now, anyway. Oh my gosh, why are they so sweaty? Why is it so hot in here? And why can’t I breathe? Someone must be sucking all of the oxygen out of the room. I jump up from my seat and fan my flushed face for a moment.
He’s sitting with his hands clasped on the table, and that smile on his face isn’t doing anything to calm my frazzled nerves. I’m pacing in front of him now, saying, “Think, think, think. I can do this.” He chuckles quietly to himself, and I stop and look at him. Really look at him.
He’s the man of my dreams. The man who has shown himself to be kind, thoughtful, and gentle in thousands of little ways throughout my entire life. He’s already shown me that he's all in. I have nothing to lose.
“Okay, I’m just going to say it…” I say. He sits up straighter in his chair, and I swear I can see his heart in his eyes. The look on his face is so tender as he silently encourages me to say what he so desperately wants to hear.
“I love you, Seth,” I say, letting the words finally spill out. My arms are tense at my sides, waiting to see how he responds.
He takes a deep, shuddering breath and stands up, knocking his chair over behind him. “Hannah…” he says as he moves to come around the table to me.
“No, I have more, and if you come over here, I won’t be able to get it out. I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember. I know ten-year-olds don’t really understand the meaning of love—the way you have to repeatedly choose and pursue each other day in and day out, even on the days you don’t want to—but in some naive, innocent way, I did love you then. I’ve tried and tried to forget about you over the years, but it’s like you’ve stuck yourself to my heart, and I could never pry you away,” I say. Tears are pouring down my face now, and he finally walks around the table and wraps me in his strong arms.
“I never had any idea. I mean, I knew you had a crush on me when you were a little girl. I thought that was adorable back then, by the way. But I had no idea that it never went away,” he says.
“Seth, I don’t want to move away. I was only moving so that I could forget about you. Well, that, and I really need a better-paying job. But I thought putting space between us would help me move on, but I don’t want to leave Waverly. I love it here, and I love you.”
“Then don’t move,” he says with a boyish smile on his face.
“I quit my job, though, and I think Colby will have a stroke if I tell him I’m staying at his house for another day.” The man has been glaring at me and working around the clock trying to reorganize his house.
“Hannanah, you do have a job…and a place to live, too, actually, if you really don’t want to stay with Colby.”
“What?”
“You have a bookstore, remember? And did you know it has a pretty great apartment on the second floor?”
“No, you have a bookstore and apartment,” I correct him. It was a sweet thought to buy the store for me, but it’s way too much. I can’t accept an entire building from him.
“How about we have a bookstore? I want us to be partners.”
In all the years that I’ve been dreaming of opening my store, I’ve never considered having a partner. Employees, yes. But never a business partner. When thinking about all of the work I would have to do alone—bookkeeping, taxes, ordering materials, marketing, etc—it all sounds overwhelming. A partner sounds wonderful.
“I’ll consider it,” I say with a smirk on my face.
“Hannanah, you’re stuck with me,” Seth says, and he scoops me up in his arms. “Now, tell me you’re not moving,” he demands with a massive grin across his face. We’re so close I can see the light dusting of freckles on his nose.
“I’m not moving to Austin.”
“And tell me you’re staying with me.” I can feel his breath on my cheeks, and it sends a shiver down my spine.