Tenderness filled his eyes, followed by apology. “I have. I know. I’d never been hurt the way you hurt me. You broke me. But now, you’re helping me put the pieces back together. I don’t know if I can really ever go back to the innocent kid I used to be... ” He laughed, as if the idea of his ever being innocent was hilarious. “But I want to try to at least give you all the same things he wanted to.” He tucked some hair behind my ear, his fingers lingering on my jaw, his eyes filled with honest devotion. “You make me want to be him again. For you.”
“I’m so sorry.” I couldn’t look at him as I said the words. My heart ached for all the pain we’d both been through. Pain I’d never meant to cause.
He leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. “Me too, Sunshine.”
As he pulled me closer to the cradle of his body, I couldn’t help but ask, “So is this what I was missing all these years?”
“Maybe. I’m not sure. We never had a chance to be those people, and a lot has changed since then. But this is what we have now. It’s not the heat talking. It’s you and me.”
“Kingston,” I whispered, staring into eyes that saw deep into my soul. He saw every part of me. He always had.
I reached up and threaded my fingers through his thick hair, dragging my nails gently along his scalp and making him shudder as he closed his eyes and soaked up the affection. This man wasn’t angry anymore, but he was starved for touch. My touch. Leaning forward, I pressed a kiss to his chest, just over his heart. I could feel it beating, strong and true, for me—his mate.
“Sunday?” he asked, uncertainty in his voice.
“Let me love you.”
“That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
I continued discovering him, kissing the hard, inked planes of muscle that made up his chest and shoulders, toying with the piercings in his nipples and loving the soft gasps that drew from him. My fingers played across his tight abs, running down, down, down, until I reached the coarse patch of hair at the base of his heavy length.
He hissed in a breath and rocked his hips. “God, that feels good. I never thought you’d want to touch me like this.”
He didn’t realize it, but he’d just given me an opening for a confession of my own. “I did,” I whispered.
He jerked, lifting his head up to stare at me. “What?”
“I thought about you every day.” I continued touching him, not meeting his eyes as I gave him a truth I never thought I’d share. “I never wanted to reject you. When I saw you that first time, God, it felt like my heart was about to explode out of my chest. You were so... beautiful. You bared yourself in the moonlight, and I wanted nothing more than to go with you and be yours. But my grandfather... I couldn’t shame him more than I already had. I couldn’t fail to shift in front of the two largest packs in the region.” I swallowed through a throat tight with regret. “So I had to give up the only chance I thought I’d ever have to actually be wanted... be loved by somebody.” I forced myself to look up at him. I didn’t want to leave him with any doubt as to my sincerity. “I had to walk away, Kingston, but I never stopped wanting you. Wishing for you and the future we should have had.”
He gritted his teeth, eyes shining as he clearly worked to control his emotions. “I would’ve accepted you. No matter what.”
Blinking hard, I let the words land. “Would you?”
He wrapped a big arm around my waist and rolled us together so I was astride him, then he took my face in his hands and pulled me down until our eyes were inches apart. “Yes.”
It was my turn to battle against a wave of tears. “Kingston.”
“I love you, Sunday. I have since the moment I first saw you, and I’ve never stopped.”
Heart in my throat, I leaned down and pressed my mouth to his, the need to connect with him completely unrelated to my heat or pheromones or lust. This was pure. I wanted him to know exactly how I felt, even if the words couldn’t leave my lips yet.
He stiffened under me, his whole body drawn tight as though he wasn't sure what was happening. I opened my eyes while our lips were still locked to find him staring at me, bewildered. Breaking the kiss, I sat up, afraid I’d done something wrong.
“What’s the matter?”
“Nothing,” he said quickly, blinking a couple of times and giving a quick shake of his head.
Is that a blush?
“I’ve never... I mean... Fuck, this is awkward.”
“Me kissing you is awkward?” Hurt and confusion laced my voice.
“Fuck, no, that’s not what I meant.” He groaned, closing his eyes. “I’ve never kissed a girl—on the mouth, I mean. Sex for me has always been about release, never anything deeper. I’d had my heart broken once. I never wanted to give anyone else a chance, so I didn’t... I mean, I kept things strictly...”
He trailed off, looking supremely embarrassed.
My heart felt like it was about to melt into a puddle at my feet. Here was more proof of the damage I’d done to him, and yet, in a completely unexpected way, it made things so much more meaningful.