Chapter 36
The horse could not go fast enough. Mary was desperate to reach the spot where she had seen Crispin previously, the place where he had said he wished to meet her again.
As hard as she tried, Mary wasn’t able to be patient. She needed to see him, to be with him. She needed to know what was on his mind and his heart before anything more could happen to come between them. There had already been so much to stop them, and it was time that they hurriedly arrange their courtship so nothing more could get in the way.
Miss Lilly was riding with her as her chaperone. Mary’s father had agreed the previous afternoon to send word to Miss Anne that he knew now that she had departed based on lies and that, because Mary would not likely need a governess much longer, he would give her a strong recommendation and speak with a friend of his who had a young daughter.
But for the moment, Miss Lilly was the one riding with Mary, and Mary was grateful for her. As they finally reached the spot where Mary had previously seen Crispin, her heart started to race. She looked out in all directions, desperately hoping to catch a glimpse of him.
After only a few moments, he came into view. From afar, she could see his dark mop of hair and broad shoulders as he rode in their direction. The groom was with him and Mary was glad to see that he, too, had a companion for the moment. There would be no question about their respectability.
For some time, Mary had feared that she would only be able to see Crispin by sneaking away in the night—the very thing she had been accused of to begin with. It had been a risk and she wished that it had not been their only means of seeing one another.
She had been desperate enough to take that risk then, but she was so happy now that she could come here to see him, even with the permission of her father.
Mary stayed where she was and it was clear that Crispin saw her as well. He came riding as quickly as he was able, galloping in her direction. She watched him come, her heart aflame with joy and love and wonder. She still had so many questions as to what would happen next for them and how he might express his feelings, but she knew in her heart that they were meant to be together always.
The moment Crispin reached Mary, she could see the look in his eyes. He held an anxious hope, just as she did. And for a long moment, neither of them could speak for all their wonder.
The groom cleared his throat, quite obviously trying to prompt Crispin to speak. As if waking from a daze, Crispin took a deep breath and shook his head to alertness.
“Lady Mary, how good it is to see you,” he said, by way of greeting.
“And you, Your Grace,” she replied, holding her breath in hopes that they would move beyond mere greetings.
“Shall we ride together?” Crispin asked.
Mary nodded and they continued at a slow pace through the meadow. Miss Lilly and the groom fell into step behind them, granting just enough distance that Crispin and Mary could speak without being heard.
“I cannot express how good it is to see you now, like this. When I spoke with your father, I had wondered if he would ever forgive me for what I said about his wife. Moreover, I knew that even with the truth coming to light, it would not be easy for him to face me. But he appeared to have undergone quite a change,” Crispin said.
“It is true. Yesterday morning he spoke of self-reflection, which is not the sort of thing I have ever heard him say,” Mary said with a surprised laugh. She was still in disbelief that her father had become so tender.
“And you? Charlotte? Lady Rachel? What has happened to all of you?” Crispin asked.
Mary smiled broadly at that. She was thrilled by all that had taken place since breakfast the previous day when her father told them his decisions. It felt as though everything was falling into place, precisely where it was meant to go.
“My stepmother departs this afternoon for Italy. She will spend six months traveling and having some time away. My father hopes that it will be good for her and that she will make wise decisions moving forward,” Mary began.
“As for Charlotte, I am pleased to say that she became formally engaged to be married yesterday afternoon. It was quite strange to have her come to my room and excitedly begin planning her wedding. She asked me for a great many opinions regarding the ceremony and how she must style her hair,” she said.
“I am sure that was a surprise to you, given the past between you and how she has always been,” Crispin acknowledged.
“Indeed, it was very strange. I had thought that nothing so good could ever take place between us and it was a shock to have her happy and approaching me with the sort of joy that a true friend might exude. Nevertheless, I was glad to have her by my side during this moment and to see how happy she was,” Mary said.
“That is truly wonderful,” Crispin said. Then, after a moment’s pause, he asked, “And what about you? What is happening in your life now?”
Mary thought about it for a moment, but there was really only one answer she could give. Having told him the resolutions of everyone else in her home, she was still awaiting her own.
“What is happening in my life is that I am here, right now. As to what comes next, I suppose that is yet to be determined,” she said, flashing him a subtle grin.
But Crispin knew that it was not so subtle. He laughed and smiled as well, clearly impressed by her prompting.
“Indeed. You are here right now. And I have much that I need to say,” he began.
Mary waited and listened as he clearly seemed to have much on his mind. She was thankful that he had come prepared, but more than that, she was desperate to know what was on his heart.
“Mary, I have apologised for all of the drama that happened between us, but I must apologise once more. I was wrong to allow any of this to go as far as it did. I could have put a stop to it that very night with Charlotte in the garden during the ball.