“But you are going to be all right. You are strong and you have been through a great deal in your young life. I know that you can make it through.” Miss Anne put her hand to Mary’s cheek.
Mary sniffed against the tears that spilled over her eyelids and down her cheeks. She threw her arms around Miss Anne and clung to the woman who had been with her through her most difficult of days.
“Oh, dearie. Be strong, Mary! Be the young lady I know you are. And know that I will still be doing my best to defend you. I have every intention of speaking with the blacksmith myself and addressing this issue with him. I know that you and Lady Beatrice did so, but that does not mean I cannot pester him about it,” Miss Anne said, looking at Mary with deep intention.
A faint smile found its way to Mary’s lips and she embraced Miss Anne one more time, thankful that this woman was so willing to put herself out for Mary’s sake.
“Now,” Miss Anne began, pulling away from Mary and swiping at the tears in her own eyes. “I do believe that I have only this final day to clear out my belongings. I must go to my room and pack my things. I shall come say farewell before I depart for my sister’s home.”
“Has she enough space for you?” Mary asked. Miss Anne had mentioned in the past that her sister lived in a small cottage with her husband and three daughters.
“Oh, yes, more than enough. I may sleep in a room with the girls, but that is of no consequence to me,” Miss Anne said, as though she cared nothing for the lovely, large room she’d had while working at the estate.
“It will be no trouble at all for you to find a new position, I am sure. You are a most excellent governess,” Mary said.
“Thank you, my dear, but my name shall no longer carry such a weight. I shall henceforth be slated as the woman who encouraged her charge to live outside of the acceptable decorum of London society. Regardless, I have no doubt that there will be something I may do moving forward,” Miss Anne clarified, trying to sound light and positive, but Mary could hear the worry in her voice. It was unnerving, seeing this side of Miss Anne.
Mary looked down, aware that Miss Anne was right. She would be disgraced now, despite the fact that none of this was her fault. Charlotte and Lady Rachel would be able to move on and live the life that they were pushing for, a life without restraint for their poor behaviour.
“Very well, then. I wish you all the best, Mary. As promised, I shall leave word with your father that you are an ideal young lady of morality and poise. And I shall encourage the blacksmith to come forward with the affair or I will find another way to ensure that you have the freedom to live the life you wish,” Miss Anne said, sweeping into a curtsey, which Mary mirrored.
But before Mary could do anything more to stop Miss Anne from going, her governess departed without hope of ever seeing one another again.
Mary’s heart sunk with such despair that she could not imagine what more was coming for her. By now, she knew that there was no chance for real happiness, that her life would forever be a war waged against her by her own stepmother and stepsister.
It no longer even appeared as if they were trying to secure Charlotte’s happiness. Indeed, it seemed that they cared more about making Mary miserable. And if that was their primary goal, what hope would there ever be for a change?
Mary knew there was no reason to go on pondering it. She needed to find a way to move on and whatever it might take to live in her own security, she would never stop searching. There had to be a resolution out there somewhere. Just because she hadn’t found it yet didn’t mean that it didn’t exist.
A couple hours later, she watched out the window as Miss Anne departed from the home, her trunk and bag loaded onto a coach by the footmen. After, Miss Anne climbed into the coach and soon she was riding up the lane and turned onto the main road where Mary could no longer see her.
Whatever loveliness Mary had once believed in, that dream was now drowning in a sea of shattered expectations. Each time Mary tried to dive in and put the pieces back together, the current only carried her further from the surface.