“Your father would gladly come rescue you, but you have not told him what they are like. He is not aware that they make you so miserable,” Sarah reasoned.
Mary said nothing in reply but maintained her light-hearted demeanour. The last thing she wanted was to let the conversation turn dour. She understood that it was difficult for her father. He was a good man, but a man with a great many interests and he could not always set them aside to come and be with Mary.
Since the death of Mary’s mother, her father had not been overly keen on spending time with her, and it made sense. After all, Mary resembled her mother in more ways than just her appearance. It had to be difficult for her father to face her.
“Enough about me, Sarah. How are you enjoying the evening? Have any gentlemen caught your attention? Have you plans to dance with anyone yet?” Mary asked.
Sarah grinned, shyly, and nodded over Mary’s left shoulder.
“And who is that?” Mary asked with barely a glance so that they were not caught looking at the man.
“I haven’t the faintest idea, but he is extremely handsome and I cannot help noticing him. But, of course, he has not looked in my direction and I am certain that I would not be to his liking,” Sarah said, adding the last with the same nonchalant acceptance that Mary so often used.
It was a sad truth, but Sarah was quite likely to find herself as a spinster. Her family had no great fortune or title, but rather lived as respected members of the community. Her elder sisters had dried up the funds her father had for dowries, making it nearly impossible to find a match. And while Mary thought Sarah was a lovely, beautiful woman, others described her as plain.
But the tall, mousy woman who had already seen four seasons prior to this one was Mary’s dearest friend. Mary simply wished that others could see the wonderful heart that Sarah had and that they would know what a great woman she truly was.
“You ought to speak with him,” Mary said, thinking Sarah should not give up hope so quickly.
“And why would I do that?” Sarah laughed. “It would hardly be proper for me to approach any man.”
“No, but you could not be found guilty if you accidentally bump into him whilst you are making your way through the crowd of guests. And if you bump into him, it is only polite that you apologise with a demure curtsey,” Mary said, smiling as she suggested the plot.
But Sarah was adamantly opposed, just as Mary knew she would be. Sarah’s eyes went wide with shock, and she shook her head quickly.
“I could never do such a thing! He would know. My cheeks would burn red, and he would know that I had done it with intention. I am certain there are any number of young ladies here tonight who are using that very tactic as a means of being noticed,” Sarah said.
Just then, Mary looked across the room and saw Charlotte bumping into a gentleman and then expressing surprise and apology. It was clearly orchestrated, and Mary laughed to herself, knowing that Sarah was right. With so many people at the ball, it was easy for any woman to pretend that she had bumped a man by mistake so she might garner his attention.
“Very well. If you think it would not work, you may simply continue gazing upon the handsome gentleman. But if you have any other thoughts as to how we might enjoy ourselves this evening, I would be so delighted to hear your ideas,” Mary said.
She didn’t dislike balls in general, but she always felt overwhelmed when she attended them. It had certainly gotten worse since Lady Rachel entered her life. Balls were now a dreadful game.
Mary had to balance caution with enthusiasm. She had to refrain from engaging with any gentleman Charlotte may have an interest in, but she also had to appear excited and respectable on behalf of the family.
Lady Rachel wanted Mary out of the way. One option was to marry her off, but only if she could find the right man. Lady Rachel needed to ensure that it was not a man so good that he might be better for Charlotte, but he had to be good enough for the family to be tied to.
She had made it so complicated that Mary usually just wanted to escape. She longed for a time when she could actually enjoy the dancing and company without fearing the wrath of her stepmother.
“Oh, did you see that?” Sarah asked, taking Mary by the arm.
“What is it?”
“I see pastries. Hundreds of them resting on silver platters. I think we must go and ensure that Charlotte is not tempted. Lady Rachel insists that she keep her waist trim, correct? We might be able to help if we eat all the pastries before Charlotte notices them,” Sarah said, grinning broadly.
Mary laughed and shook her head.
“Oh, dear! I think you have found a wisdom the likes of which Lady Rachel is unprepared for. But I do think it is an excellent idea and if you think that we might be able to help Charlotte and any other young woman here tonight, we ought to make haste,” Mary said, going along with Sarah.
Neither woman was a glutton; they were simply happy to have an easy task that would get them out of the way of everyone else. And Mary needed that more than anything—she needed to be away from her stepmother and stepsister.
She longed for a day to come when there might be something better for her. Maybe a day when her father would realise she was unhappy. Or maybe a day when someone else would sweep her away from this life into one of hope and peace.