“How is she?”
“I’ll answer that if you answer one question for me first.”
He nodded his head. “Anything.”
“Did you use protection?”
“What?”
I raised my voice. “When you were fucking my fiancée, did you use a condom?”
“Yes, always. Why?”
I felt as relieved as I could. “She’s still in a coma. There are brainwaves, and my daughter is holding on.”
The guy blinked. He hadn’t known either. “Amelia’s…pregnant?”
My lip curled. “I answered your question. You might as well go home because you’re never getting in that room to see her. I’ll kill you before that happens.”
• • •
Later that night, I was back at the hospital alone. I sat in the chair beside Amelia as the night nurse came to examine her. After a quick check of her vitals, she put the stethoscope on her belly and held it there listening. “Oh wow…” She removed the listening part from her ears. “I just felt the baby move.”
I sat up. “You did?”
She nodded. “Come here. Put your hand right where the stethoscope is now.”
I hesitated, but eventually set my hand on Amelia’s belly. Her skin was so warm and soft. At first, there was nothing, but after a minute, I felt a roll in her stomach. My eyes widened. It was the first time I’d smiled in almost four days. “I felt it.”
She nodded. “That’s an active little bugger.”
“Figures. She’s probably just like her mother.”
The woman smiled. “It’s a girl?”
I nodded. I felt the movement again, this time it was more like a poke than a roll. “I think she just kicked me.”
She laughed. “Well, her heartbeat sounds good, and it’s a good sign that she’s kicking at this age. Some people can’t feel the baby for a few more weeks.”
I kept my hand on Amelia’s belly and looked up at her. I’d been afraid to even consider that the baby could be mine before now, before the other possibility confirmed they’d been careful. Amelia and I weren’t, though she’d been on the pill since we met. But something happened in that moment—feeling the baby move for the first time. She went from being Amelia’s baby to our baby. I was so fucking mad at Amelia, but it wasn’t fair to take it out on this little one.
I’d been so lost in thought that I almost forgot the nurse was there until she spoke. “I’ll come back and check on her in a few hours.”
“Okay.”
After she left, I laid my cheek on Amelia’s stomach, right over where I’d felt the movement, and shut my eyes.
I’m having a baby.
A little girl.
For the first time, I let the gravity of that sink in. Something bloomed in my heart, but the weight of everything else felt like it was crushing my chest.
What if Amelia doesn’t wake up?
What if my little girl has to grow up without a mother?
What if I lose them both?
My throat constricted. I tried to swallow the taste of salt, but I was no match for the wave that was coming. For four days, I hadn’t shed a single tear. Anger and sadness had blocked them. But suddenly, my body wanted to make up for lost time. Tears began to flow, streaming down my face and falling from my cheeks onto Amelia’s belly. My shoulders shook, sobs wracking over me as I let out a harrowing sound.
I have no idea how long I cried, but it felt like hours. At one point, the nurse even came back to check on me. When my tears finally dried, I turned my head and kissed Amelia’s belly.
“I’m sorry. I’ve been so mad at your mother that I haven’t even acknowledged you. Forgive me. It won’t happen again. From now on, I promise to be there and take care of you every step of the way, my precious little girl.”