CHAPTER TEN
LEANDRODIDN’TSAYANYTHING.He nudged open the heavy door to the suite. He could feel a cold thread of something...What was that emotion? Surely it wasn’t fear?It rippled through him and in that very instant he realised that the terms of the contract had changed.
How had that happened?
He was always the one in control, always the one who called the shots and yet now, as he looked at the cool, determined expression on her face, he knew that the role had been reversed.
Old instincts died hard, though. A primal revulsion at the thought of anyone else having a say over him, over his thoughts and decision, roared into life, obliterating everything else in its path.
‘Maybe we do.’ He held her gaze for a couple of seconds, then strode off towards the kitchen where he dumped the now forgotten glass of apricot juice so that he could help himself to a glass of cold water. Frankly, he could have done with something stronger.
He felt rather than saw her pace to the kitchen behind him and his pulses quickened.
‘You were hurt.’ Leandro dumped the empty glass on the pale, glossy counter and folded his arms.
‘Yes,’ Celia said quietly. ‘I was hurt even though I knew that I had no right to be.’
‘Why?’ Leandro demanded.
‘Because I foolishly trusted you...’ Celia’s heart was beating fast. He had seen her, had seen the expression on her face before she had had time to conceal it and he was astute enough when it came to reading women to know what had been going through her head. All the pitfalls to this arrangement were suddenly laid bare and, while she would much rather have not had to face up to them just yet, maybe it was all for the best that they did. Marriage was a solid commitment and not to be taken lightly. She’d dithered and agonised over what would happen without Love as the glue to bind them, not as parents but as two human beings sharing a life together.
She’d pretended a lot of things to herself from the very first moment she had slept with Leandro. Before even.
She’d pretended that she wasn’t attracted to him, and then when she’d faced that one down and accepted the truth, she’d kidded herself that fancying someone was a far cry from having feelings for them.
What a joke!
How could she ever have swept every core value she’d grown up with under the carpet?
And yet that was what she had done. She’d managed to convince herself that she could be like him, that she could detach, and of course she couldn’t.
What a mess. How on earth could she have contemplated a life in love with a guy who wasn’t in love with her? This very moment was always going to come, the moment when she knew that he would always be attracted to other women. He might not consider doing anything with any of them, not now at any rate, but how long would that situation last?
The very fact that he had no desire to at least defend himself against what he knew she would have been thinking pretty much said it all.
‘And what have I done that makes you assume you can’t trust me? I’ve been honest with you from day one, honest about...the man I am...’
‘So you have. I don’t want to have this conversation standing up here.’ She spun round on her heel and padded towards the sitting room to perch, arms clasped tightly around herself. She looked at him as he sat on the chair opposite her but then he pulled it closer and leaned forwards so that he was crowding her.
‘I thought I could do this,’ Celia said quietly. ‘Even when I saw you there, talking to that woman—’
‘Friend,’ Leandro interrupted, ‘talking to thatfriend. I know Leila’s father. I’ve met her a few times in the past and she’s like a sister to me.’
Celia blushed but she wasn’t going to apologise for jumping to the wrong conclusion because it didn’t make any difference.
‘Whatever...’
‘No!’ Leandro all but roared. ‘It’s not a case ofwhatever!’ He vaulted upright, raked his fingers through his hair but just as quickly sat back down, his body language urgent and demanding.
It was late but he hardly noticed the hour.
No deal, however big, no decision, however life-changing, had ever occupied his attention the way it was occupied now.
‘It would have happened sooner or later,’ Celia told him gently. ‘I know we both had the best of intentions going into this and I wish so much that I could carry on believing that those good intentions would be enough to see us through but, for me, they just won’t be.’
‘Don’t say that. You’ve barely given this a chance.’
‘It’s...it’s not got anything to do with giving it a chance.’