Her smile gets wider, perhaps a little more comfortable. “She told me that ‘wasn’t very Christ-like.’”
“She’s one of those, huh?”
Jessa nods with a tired grimace on her face. “My fiancé and best friend had cheated and lied to me for years, but somehow, I was still the one in the wrong for not being forgiving enough.”
“So what did you say?”
“I told her I didn’t want to speak to her anymore. My father stepped in and told me not to be rude to my mother.” She shakes her head. “I walked out on them both.”
“Have you heard from them since?”
“No. And I’m not likely to, either. In my family, the child always has to apologize first.”
“You planning to?” I ask curiously.
She bites her lip. The gesture is surprisingly endearing. She hesitates for a moment before she answers. “Eventually, I will.”
“Why?”
“Because they’re my parents.”
“That’s a piss-poor reason.”
“You’re giving me advice now?” she scoffs.
“I feel like you asked for it.”
She considers that a moment and nods. “Mom’s birthday is coming up. I have to call her for that.”
“Who says you have to do anything?”
She frowns. “She’s my mother.”
“So?”
She shakes her head. “You clearly don’t understand. You’re not used to compromising or… or being the bigger person.”
“Look at me, Jessa. I’m always the bigger person.”
She guffaws with laughter then looks embarrassed. It’s surprisingly easy to sit here in her claustrophobic little apartment and listen to her ramble. I’m not restless, stirred up the way I usually am. I can just… breathe.
“So,” I press, “you’re brave when it comes to bullies but not when it comes to your parents?”
“It’s not the same thing.”
“Isn’t it?”
She considers that for a moment. “My parents do care about me, even if it’s not always obvious to me. They just think they know best.”
“And do you agree that they do?”
“Well, I think I’ve proven that I clearly don’t know best. So maybe it’s possible that they do.”
“Your mother’s advice was to go back to your cheating fiancé and marry him. Does that sound like good advice to you?”
She sighs. “If anyone has the right to give me that advice, it’s her.”
I wait for her to continue, because I know she will. There’s something she wants to get off her chest. Something she hasn’t shared with many people before me.