Rush let out a sigh. “Harlow is the most sheltered person I know. She has been protected and guarded her entire life. She’s the only child of Kiro’s to make it into the news. So he hid her in North Carolina with her grandmother. He hated the way the news wanted to know everything about her. He used his money to keep the world out of her life. Once her grandmother died she was thrust into his world and did the only thing she knew to do. She hid away in her room. Now she’s here and she needs friends. She can’t stay home and hide. She has Nan there. So, sure. Someone asked her out. She went. Why the hell not? You haven’t asked her out. You haven’t done shit.”
“I’m scared of her.” There. I said it.
Rush frowned. “You’re scared of her? Harlow? Or are we talking about Nan?”
“I’m scared of Harlow. Of what I could feel for her.”
“You’re afraid you’ll fall in love with her,” he said, finally understanding.
I just nodded.
“Why? What’s so wrong with that? It’s a hell of a lot better than what I walked in on this morning.”
I gripped the railing in front of me. I hated that I was about to admit this. It made me sound so weak. “What if I lost her? Like Jace.”
“You could lose anyone. You could lose me, but you don’t keep me out.”
It was different. I looked at him. “What if you lost Blaire?” I asked. Surely he feared that.
Rush frowned. “It would be the hardest thing I’d ever have to face. Losing her would take my soul. But I can’t not love her for fear of losing her. What kind of life is that? I wouldn’t know how amazing it feels to wake up with her in my arms. I wouldn’t get to enjoy watching her laugh and play with Nate. It’s worth it. Letting something like that stop you is letting fear control you. Don’t do that to yourself. Every moment I get with Blaire and Nate makes a life without them seem shallow and lonely.”
I could see it on his face. He didn’t fear losing her. It didn’t haunt him. He loved his life now. Focusing on what could happen wasn’t holding him back. Was that what life was about? Taking chances?
“If you think she could be the one then it’s time you take a chance. If I lost all that I have tomorrow, I wouldn’t regret one single minute. Ever. They’re what makes my life worth it.”
“My dad thought he was in love twice. Both times he was burned, and I paid the price. And I look at his life and where he is now, and it’s sad. I don’t want that.”
Rush shook his head at me as if he didn’t understand me at all. “The two women your dad loved were nothing like Harlow. Your dad didn’t choose well. Harlow is a good choice. The man who owns her heart will be lucky. She is honest and kind. I’ve never seen her be anything but both of those things. So, if she’s the one you allow yourself to fall in love with then I’d be more than happy for you.”
He was right.
A heavy weight that had been sitting on my chest slowly lifted. What he was saying made sense. And I didn’t have to hurt myself to protect myself.
“I may have pushed her too far away,” I said, letting reality sink in.
Rush shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe you never stood a chance to begin with. But is she worth trying?”
I nodded. “Yeah, she’s worth begging,” I replied.
Rush sat down and propped his feet up on the railing. “Then I guess you need to stop having threesomes in your bed with strangers and work on getting Harlow to give you another chance.”
That sounded easier said than done. I had told her I didn’t want to have anything more than a friendship with her. She’d agreed and left it at that. Now what? I should just tell her I changed my mind?
“I don’t think she’s going to let me in that easy. And then there’s that brother of hers who doesn’t approve of me.”
Rush chuckled. “Mase? Yeah, he’ll be hard to win over. Good thing is you won’t have to kiss him and beg for forgiveness. Just focus on Harlow.”
For the first time in months I had hope. The idea of being near Harlow again and spending time with her was more exciting than anything else I could think of . . . except getting her nak*d.
Harlow
Afar-off ringing interrupted my dreams. Forcing my eyes open, I realized the sound was my phone. I rolled over and saw Dean Finlay’s number on my screen. This could only be about my dad. Rush’s father only called when something was up with Kiro. I sat up and quickly answered.
“Hey. What’s wrong?” I asked, then glanced at the time. It was a little after three in the morning.
“He’s missing again,” Dean replied.
This was not the first time my father had gone missing. Unfortunately, Daddy would get so high he would do stupid things like go off with women he didn’t know and sober up in their bed, oftentimes cities away from where he was supposed to be.
I stood up and went to my closet for some clothes. “How long?” I asked.
“After the concert last night he was partying with some groupies. I left him to go to the limo and rest. That was the last time I saw him. Trac was still in there with him and so was Wayne. Wayne was too trashed to remember anything. Trac said he left with two women. One had red hair, the other had long, curly brown hair. He didn’t think anything of it.”
Trac Trace was the bass guitar player and Wayne Rolls was the lead guitarist. I shoved my legs into a pair of jeans. “Where was Hail?” I asked. Hail Holloway played the keyboard. He was also the most responsible.
“Hail had already left for the night. He knows nothing.”
“I’m getting dressed. Where are y’all right now?” I knew Dean had called because getting me there was the only way to find Daddy. He went off the deep end sometimes and I seemed to be the only one who could bring him back. Dean said once it was because I looked just like my momma.
“I hate for you to come out here all alone. Isn’t safe,” he said with a worried tone. “I’d send for Rush but he ain’t gonna wanna leave Nate and Blaire.”
“Mase is here visiting. He’ll probably come with me. Where are y’all?” I asked, then buttoned up my shirt.
“Vegas,” he said with a sigh.
“I’m on my way. Not sure when I can get a flight out but I’ll be there. Keep me posted.”
“I’ve already sent the jet. It’ll be at the private strip in Destin waiting on you in about thirty minutes. Your daddy wouldn’t want you in a commercial airplane.”
“Thanks, I’ll try calling him. If he’s gonna answer anyone’s phone call it’ll be mine,” I said.
“Yeah. Keep trying him. I’ll see you soon, kid.”
“Bye,” I replied, then hung up and grabbed a suitcase. I had clothes to pack. I didn’t know how long this would take. I also needed to wake up Mase.
Opening my door quietly, I walked down to Mase’s room and knocked several times before I heard him grunt. Good, he was in there.
“What?” he grumbled.
I opened the door slowly and peeked inside. “Dad’s missing. I gotta go to Vegas and help find him.”
Mase sat up and rubbed his face hard with both hands in an attempt to wake up. “You have got to be shitting me. How old is he, eighteen? Fuck. How does he just up and go missing? He’s Kiro Manning, for fuck’s sake.”
Mase had no idea how common this was. “It’s something that happens with him on tour. I’ll find him or he’ll eventually answer my calls. I just have to go. The jet is picking me up about twenty minutes from here.”
I watched as Mase battled with himself on what to do. He didn’t like being around the band. He rarely came around anymore. Looking for Dad also wasn’t something he wanted to do.
“I’m going, too. You can’t go alone to Vegas. Let me get dressed and grab some shit.”
I didn’t tell him he didn’t have to; I just nodded and closed the door behind me. I still needed to pack and brush my teeth and hair. I dialed Dad’s number on my way back to my room and it rang three times then went to voicemail.
•
Once I had my overnight bag packed I headed down the hall and for the stairs. I needed some coffee and I knew Mase would, too. Waking Nan up to tell her was pointless. She would be mad that I’d disturbed her. Might as well not even tell her we were leaving. She probably wouldn’t notice.
Just as I put the coffee into the filter there was a light knock on the front door. What the heck? I glanced at the time and it was only three-forty-five. Who would be here this early?
I closed the lid to the coffeepot and pressed brew before going to the front door. It was too dark to see outside. I turned on the outdoor lights and saw Grant standing outside with a thermos in one hand, looking wide awake.
Opening the door, I stared at him, completely confused, but I couldn’t just leave him out there.
Grant grinned at me. “You ready?”
What? Was I dreaming? Was Daddy really not missing? Had this been some elaborate dream where I ended up in bed with Grant again? I had those often enough.
“Dean called Rush who called me. Can I come in?” he said, stepping by me and into the house.
“What?” I finally managed to ask.
Grant held up his thermos of coffee. “I’m ready to go find Kiro. I’ll even drive us to the airport.”
Mase’s heavy footsteps broke into my thoughts and I turned to see him walking toward us. “Is this a damn search party?” Mase grumbled, dropping his bag at his feet and looking from me to Grant.
“Looks that way,” Grant said.
“I, uh . . .” was all I could think of to say. I still hadn’t figured this out.
“Go get you some of that coffee I smell, Sis; you need it to make coherent sentences. I’ll deal with this,” Mase said.
I didn’t want to leave Grant alone with him but, honestly, I didn’t know what else to do.
So I went to get the coffee.
Grant
“Explain this,” Mase said, standing with his feet apart and his arms crossed over his chest. He was Harlow’s older brother and possibly the only person who had ever stepped into the father figure role in her life. I respected that.
“I want to go with her. I have a lot of shit to make up for. I’m starting now.”
Mase frowned and continued to stare at me. “What the hell does that mean? Last I heard you were f**king Nan. What do you have to do with Harlow?”
She hadn’t told him anything. I wondered if she had done that to protect me. “I was scared of having feelings for someone. Harlow stirred things in me I wasn’t familiar with and it made me run. I’ve decided I don’t want to run.”
Mase took a step toward me. “You need to be real damn sure of that. ’Cause she likes you more than she wants to and I don’t trust you. Not at all. If you want to go help find our sorry-ass father then fine, but I’m going, too.”
I preferred to have her alone but this was okay. At least I was near her. I was tired of not being near her and watching her from afar.