“That’s it, I’m fucking done.” Eagle made a beeline for the door, but Hadley was quick to rush after him.
“We’ll stop.” She laughed, grabbing his arm and pulling him back. “Okay, is everyone ready? Are we really gonna do this?”
I grinned, grabbing my small but beautiful bouquet and hooking my arm through Hadley’s.
“Damn right we are.”
I can’t help but laugh as Macy pranced down the aisle, sprinkling her bright red rose petals not only between the chairs but tossing them across the people on either side. We practiced it like four times yesterday, walk, leave a trail behind her, give Daddy a cuddle.
When she got to the end of the aisle, I thought she might get one thing right at least as she ran toward Uncle Leo, who was looking awfully handsome in his suit with his club cut proudly displayed over his pristine white collared shirt. I tried to keep my eyes on my uncle, but he just so happened to have chosen Ham to stand beside him, since Eagle had the job of making sure Hadley got down the aisle to him. And Lord was he looking fine. I caught his eye for a second, and he winked causing my cheeks to instantly flush.
Uncle Leo crouched down, opening his arms for Macy to leap into them and hug him, but she stopped short and held up her hand. He raised an eyebrow and Ham snorted holding in his laughter.
“High five, Daddy,” she exclaimed, getting frustrated when he just stared at her. With a wide grin, he finally slapped his hand to hers, and she turned around to face everyone with a heavy sigh. “Finally!”
Laughter filled the backyard, and Hadley nudged me in the back urging me to walk on ahead now that the princess had her moment. I swallowed the nervous lump in my throat. I don’t know why it was there, these people were family, there was no need to feel shy. With a deep breath, I managed to take that first step, followed by the second. Each step got easier. Hell, with the way I was shaking, you’d think this was my wedding.
By the time I got halfway, I was feeling pretty good. Looking out at the friends and family surrounding us, but when I finally risked looking up again, and my eyes met Ham’s, I knew instantly that was why my stomach was swirling and turning itself inside out. His eyes glued to me with that same intense stare that always made me feel naked. There was nothing I could hide when he saw through me like that. He saw my heart, my soul, my fears, and my dreams, and that was what made Ham so dangerous.
I couldn’t hide from him.
I managed to make it to the end of the aisle without making an idiot of myself and wrapped my arms around Uncle Leo’s waist. He kissed the top of my head, and I smiled at the way I could feel his body shaking. He was nervous. You’d think doing this for the second time would make it easier, but the reality was, he’d put his entire heart into his first marriage. He loved Aunt Kim more than I thought another person could.
And she was taken from him.
Stolen away in one moment in time.
One moment in time which left a hole in his heart that would never be repaired.
Now he was about to do it again. He was going into this with a piece of his heart already missing, and he was risking it being broken all over again if something happened and he lost Hadley.
It was hard to comprehend how you’d want to put yourself through that pain again—willingly. But when I saw Hadley and Leo together, I could see the love in their eyes, the need to be with each other. They were willing to risk the greatest pain if it meant they could feel love for just a moment. Because to them, that one moment in heaven was worth an eternity in hell.
That was dedication.
That was love.