My ears perked up, and I sat a little straighter. “You guys are going to the University of Arizona?”
Asha and Callie both nodded excitedly. “Yeah, the boys, too,” Asha confirmed. “We’re gonna drive to Vegas one weekend a month. It’s going to be awesome!”
A strike of jealousy swirled in my stomach.
The University of Arizona was my dream college. It was important to me, more than just a place to study. It was where my grandparents had attended, where they had immersed themselves in college culture and been proud as hell about being a Wildcat. I still had some of their old gear. It was faded and worn, but it was all I had of them. Ever since I was old enough to know what college was, I’d sworn I was going to go there, and I was going to make them proud. I’d even applied and was accepted.
“What college are you going to, Meyah?” Callie asked curiously.
I cleared my throat, not wanting to answer. “Just Alabama State,” I answered shyly. It was still a good college. It had the classes I needed and the college lifestyle every new college student was excited to experience. And it was only a couple of hours from home—within my safety net.
“Are you not excited about going?” Asha enquired with a frown.
I smiled and shook my head. “Just hearing you talk about U of A makes me a little jealous. I really wanted to go there, and I got accepted, but it’s just… a little far, I guess.”
“Something keeping you here?”
My stomach twisted at the question. Was there something keeping me here? I was suddenly having this moment of independence where I wanted to be seen as an adult. Where I wanted to be able to make my own choices and be my own person, but I was too scared to go to a college—not just a college, but the college I’ve dreamed of for years—just because I might get a little homesick?
Was it that? Or was it the thought of leaving a certain biker that I’d been obsessed with for over a year now.
I was still angry. Still annoyed at Ham.
But the idea of walking away and not having him around me most days for the next three years almost sounded like a prison sentence. It wasn’t just because we’d suddenly built this relationship—if you could even call it that—or because of how I’d let him in, let him touch me, let him inside me, it was more than just what things had developed into. It was about where they started.
“I think it’s more likesomeoneis keeping her here,” Emma commented, looking pointedly at me.
I glared back at her. “It’s not just someone,” I argued, but even as the words left my mouth, I knew they sounded pathetic, even if they were truer than anything. Yes, I had these stupid teenage fantasies about Ham and me being together, but it was never just about me wanting him. It was more about just not wanting to be far from him. He made me feel different. Safe. Then there was my mom who wanted me to be closer and being the compliant and obedient child I was, I’d agreed. The only reason I’d even filled out the application for U of A was because Hadley had encouraged me to make sure I had options just in case some fell through.
Because of my grades, I’d even been offered a place in a summer school program. One that wasn’t a compulsory paper for the degree I was going to study in psychology and counseling, but which could benefit my job prospects dramatically at the end of my degree.
When I’d got the acceptance letter, I’d almost cried. Firstly, because I’d been accepted to the one place I’d dreamed of for years, and secondly because I knew I was never going to say yes.
“Hey, you girls want to head out to the party soon?” Cab asked as he and Trent stumbled over to our table, the both of them grinning like Cheshire cats. They’d been coming and going as they liked, keeping their girlfriends happy, but no doubt wanting to have some time with their friends from the football team.
Frowning, I pulled my phone from my bag and looked at the time. “It’s only 10:30 p.m.” Everyone was still dancing and having fun. It didn’t look like anyone was leaving anytime soon, and the prom was meant to go until 1:00 a.m.
Callie’s eyes brightened, and a sly grin grew on her blush colored lips. “They’re announcing Prom King and Queen at 11:00 p.m. And I have it on good authority that we can all guess pretty damn easily who’s going to win despite having his asshole beaten by a girl.”
They all looked at me, and I groaned. “Are you serious? He’s still going to win?”
Cab nodded, his face also twisted in disdain. “Nick holds power because he can buy his popularity, and unfortunately, the majority of our student body fall into that ‘extremely fucking shallow’ category.”
I’d believe it, and I knew that was why no one was ever on my side because it was never just Nick they were standing up to, it was all the people he could control. There was no way in hell I wanted to stick around and watch him have a crown placed on his bloated head and watch him wander around like he was fucking untouchable.
“A party you say?”