Oh, God.
“I’m just—” His voice was rough. “I—”
Andy wanted to disappear into the ether. “I should—”
He pressed his fingers to her mouth to stop her. “You really are so beautiful. All I could think about in there was kissing you.” His thumb traced across her lips. He looked like he was going to kiss her again, but he took a step back and tucked his hand into his pocket instead. “I’m really attracted to you. I mean, obviously, I’m attracted to you, but—”
“Please don’t.”
“I need to say this,” he told her, because his feelings were the most important thing right now. “I’m not that guy. You know, the one who picks up women in bars and takes them to the parking lot and—”
“I wasn’t going to,” Andy said, but that was a lie because she’d been about to. “I didn’t—”
“Could you—”
Andy waited.
Mike didn’t finish his sentence. He just shrugged and said, “I should go.”
She kept waiting for more because she was stupid.
“Anyway.” He pulled his keys out of his pocket and looped the keychain around his fingers. And then he laughed.
Please don’t make a joke about me giving your keychain a handjob.
He said, “I could—I mean, I should walk you to—”
Andy left. Her face was on fire as she crossed the road. He was watching her leave again the same way he had watched her leave outside of the hospital. “Idiot, idiot, idiot,” Andy whispered, then, “What the fuck? What the fuck?”
She felt disgusted with herself as she climbed the stairs to the motel. Mike’s truck was pulling onto the road. He was looking up at her as she walked across the balcony. Andy wished for a bazooka to blow him away. Or a gun to kill herself with. She had never hooked up with a stranger. Not even in college. What the hell was wrong with her? Why was she making such stupid decisions? She was a criminal on the run. No one could be trusted. So what if Mike had an Alabama driver’s license? Laura had one from Ontario, for fucksakes. She had a fake car. Mike could have a fake truck. The sign with the grasshopper was magnetized, not permanently stuck on. The bartender could’ve been friendly with Mike because bartenders are always friendly with their customers.
Andy jammed the key in the lock and threw open the door to her room. She was so upset that she barely noted the suitcase and sleeping bag were where she’d left them.
She sat on the bed, head in her hands, and tried not to burst into tears.
Had Mike played her? For what purpose? Was he some freak who was interested in Andy because he saw her on the diner video? He’d sure as hell spent a lot of time figuring out what had happened between Laura and Jonah Helsinger. At least what he thought had happened. He probably had a conspiracy blog. He probably listened to those crazy shows on the radio.
But he had called her beautiful. And he was right about being excited. Unless somehow between opening the front door of the bar and walking to his truck he’d shoved a can of Coke down his pants.
“Christ!”
That stupid keychain.
Andy stood up. She had to pace. She had to go through every single fucking stupid thing she had done. Kissed him too deeply? Too much saliva? Not enough tongue? Maybe her breasts were too small. Or, God, no—
She smelled her bra, which carried the scent of the disgusting hotel soap.
Did guys care about that kind of thing?
Andy covered her eyes with her hands. She sank back to the bed.
The memory of her fingers stroking that stupid keychain in his pocket made her cheeks radiate with heat. He had probably been insulted. Or maybe he hadn’t wanted to take advantage of someone who was so painfully inept. What kind of idiot thought a rabbit’s foot keychain was a man’s penis?
But what kind of grown-ass man kept a giant rabbit’s foot in his pocket?
That guy.
What the hell did that even mean—that guy?