“So elegant,” Clara murmured, but Andy barely registered the comment.
The woman crossing the stage was young-looking, maybe eighteen, and obviously uncomfortable walking in such dressy shoes. Her hair was bleached almost white, permed within an inch of its life. The camera swept to the audience. They were giving her a standing ovation before she even turned to look at them.
The camera zoomed in on the woman’s face.
Andy felt her stomach clench.
Laura.
In the video, her mother performed a slight bow. She looked so cool as she stared into the faces of thousands of people. Andy had seen that look before on other performers’ faces. Absolute certainty. She had always loved watching an actor’s transformation from the wings, had been in awe that they could walk out in front of all of those judgmental strangers and so believably pretend to be someone else.
Like her mother had pretended for all of Andy’s life.
The worst type of bullshit.
The cheering started to die down as Jinx Queller sat down in front of the piano.
She nodded to the conductor.
The conductor raised his hands.
The audience abruptly silenced.
Clara turned up the volume as loud as it would go.
Violins strummed. The low vibration tickled her eardrums. Then the tempo bounced, then calmed, then bounced again.
Andy didn’t know music, especially classical. Laura never listened to it at home. The Red Hot Chili Peppers. Heart. Nirvana. Those were the groups that Laura played on the radio when she was driving around town or doing chores or working on patient reports. She knew the words to “Mr. Brightside” before anyone else did. She had downloaded “Lemonade” the night it dropped. Her eclectic taste made her the cool mom, the mom that everyone could talk to because she wouldn’t judge you.
Because she had played Carnegie Hall and she knew what the fuck she was talking about.
In the video, Jinx Queller was still waiting at the piano, hands resting in her lap, eyes straight ahead. Other instruments had joined the violins. Andy didn’t know which ones because her mother had never taught her about music. She had discouraged Andy from joining the band, winced every time Andy picked up the cymbals.
Flutes. Andy could see the guys in front pursing their lips.
Bows moved. Oboe. Cello. Horns.
Jinx Queller still patiently awaited her turn at the grand piano.
Andy pressed her palm to her stomach as if to calm it. She was sick with tension for the woman in the video.
Her mother.
This stranger.
What was Jinx Queller thinking while she waited? Was she wondering how her life would turn out? Did she know that she would one day have a daughter? Did she know that she had only four years left before Andy came along and somehow took her away from this amazing life?
At 2:22, her mother finally raised her hands.
There was an appreciable tension before her fingers lightly touched the keys.
Soft at first, just a few notes, a slow, lazy progression.
The violins came back in, then her hands moved faster, floating up and down the keyboard, bringing out the most beautiful sound that Andy had ever heard.
Flowing. Lush. Rich. Exuberant.
There weren’t enough adjectives in the world to describe what Jinx Queller coaxed from the piano.