Jesus. I can actually see the morbid scene in my head.
“Here’s the thing about suicide,” Nick continues. “It’s a selfish act. One of the most selfish things a person can do. Because the person committing suicide has now given all their problems to the living. Their issues now are passed on to their loved ones. But my father… he was different. He was trying to take us with him. He didn’t want my mother to have to try to continue alone. I suppose he thought he was doing what was best for the family.”
I’m speechless. I don’t even know how to respond to what Nick is saying. I’m feeling sick to my stomach at the very thought of his awful memories.
Nick is quiet for a moment but then asks, “So, your mother…” he begins, pausing as if searching for the right words to use. “She bounced from one scam to another, correct?”
“Yes.” I drink from my Prosecco, trying to not roll my eyes.
“Money was important, but I get the feeling you never had it.”
“Correct. We were always chasing the dream of money.”
“So, why did your mother not go after Bryant for child support? Why did you not?”
I inhale deeply. “My mother wanted nothing to do with Bryant. She didn’t want to talk about him often. She almost seemed afraid of him. Who knows? Maybe he already paid her off at one point and she blew the money. Maybe they had some sort of deal. She’d answer the questions I had about him, but with short answers not giving away much.” I shrug. “We just kept him off-limits for some reason. I never really questioned it. Dylan didn’t either. Bryant was always just a fairy tale off in the distance. Not obtainable, and not a place we wanted to go.” I refocus my attention on the violinist. “Maybe I was afraid of rejection. What if I went to him as a daughter would a father and was laughed at and turned away? I think it was better to just keep up that wall around my heart.”
Nick picks up his glass and raises it for a cheers. “Here’s to shitty parents and becoming stronger because of them.”
I tap my glass to his. “Cheers.”
We both had that fact in common.
“I’m ready to take you back to our villa.” He leans in so close that I wonder if he’s waiting for me to meet him halfway so we can kiss. “I want to take you back so I can fuck you so hard that you scream my name loud enough for everyone to hear.”
My face heats at his words, but I can’t help but wish we were already back in bed. I fear that Nick has unleashed a beast inside of me. At least now I can keep up with his monster.
“But first,” he cuts into my fantasies, “tattoos!”
Blinking, I ask, “Tattoos?”
“Absolutely. We’re in one of my most favorite cities in the world. I’m with a beautiful woman. We just shared shit I wouldn’t tell a single soul.” He smiles. “Yeah, we have to mark this day with ink.” He stands up from the table and extends his hand. “We can walk to the tattoo shop. It’s just a few blocks away.”