Right now, he was focused on maintaining the mask of normalcy for his companions. Yes, they all heard the words that he was a god now, but he could at least pretend to still be a normal human to put them at ease. They all had enough to worry about with the Ordas trying to kill them at every step. He didn’t want them worrying about how he was different or what it meant for their small family.
And maybe the mask was for him, too.
If he could pretend he was a normal human, he could cling to the idea that he was going to return to his old life when this was over. He could sit on the throne, protect his people, and marry the man he loved. That was all he wanted.
But was it too late for that dream?
“Actually, when I was in the air a bit ago, I spotted what looked to be a building near the river. Couldn’t have been more than half a mile from here,” Drayce interjected, thankfully tearing Caelan’s mind from thoughts that weren’t helping anyone.
“Can you push on?” Caelan asked, gazing at Eno and Rayne.
Both of them nodded and shoved to their feet. They grabbed their packs and started to pick their way through the thick growth. The nice thing about each fight was that it temporarily bought them some breathing room. The other animals in the Ordas were more interested in eating the dead they left behind than trying to take them on in a fresh fight.
Drayce moved into the lead, his slender form slipping easily between the trees and under the vines. Caelan brought up the rear, protecting Rayne’s and Eno’s backs. Noise from the rushing river grew louder with each step as Drayce took them closer to the bank. Caelan’s eyes scanned the tree limbs over their heads and the surrounding area for possible attacks, but it seemed as if the local wildlife was giving them a wide berth.
Inevitably, his eyes were drawn to Drayce as he moved with relative ease through the brush. After returning from the Isle of Stone, his oldest friend appeared to move with a new confidence. There was no more hesitance in his speech, and he was more willing to jump into the lead rather than waiting to see what Caelan would do or say.
That final secret of who he was had fallen off his shoulders, and his beautiful fiancé could be himself.
But not completely.
Yes, he didn’t have to hide his dragon side from his lover or their small family, but it needed to be hidden from the rest of the world. Within the Ordas, Drayce was spending more time in his dragon form. Of course, it was effective when it came to killing beasts determined to rip them apart, but Drayce just seemed happier as a dragon. Was it wrong of him to expect Drayce to hide this part of himself away from the world?
Naturally, that was assuming they’d survive any of this in the first place.
All the same, how could Caelan ask Drayce to go back to pretending this wasn’t a big part of who he was?
For now, he kept these thoughts to himself. He was afraid to ask Drayce what he preferred. He was afraid that he wouldn’t be able to give Drayce what he wanted in order to be happy, or that Drayce would simply flash that crooked grin and state that he only needed Cael to be happy. That couldn’t possibly be enough.
Despite the relatively short distance, it took them nearly half an hour to reach the ramshackle wooden building Drayce had spotted. They spent a little time scoping out the area, but it was clear the place hadn’t been used in several months at the very least. It was a quickly built place of wood with corrugated metal for the roof. Vines were snaking up the sides, trying to reclaim the slice of land that had been carved out.
In front of the building was a long wooden dock, but it was currently empty and starting to tilt into the water. The boards were warped and coated in green moss, seeming just one bad storm away from falling completely into the river.
With weapons drawn, they edged closer to inspect the structure. There were several steel drums for fuel storage, though most of them sounded empty when thumped.
Eno kicked in the door, the wood around the padlock giving way easily. He led the way inside, pulling his flashlight from his pocket.
“Dude,” Drayce said, nudging Caelan with his elbow. “Can you make one of your white sparks to light this place?”
Caelan opened his mouth to laugh at the suggestion, but the sound became trapped in his throat. Why not try? He wasn’t going to learn what he could and couldn’t do until he tried.