“I don’t know if it will ever be the same as it was,” she said. “But it was never easy. It was never perfect. I can always see those sorts of tendencies in him. Those beliefs.”
“But you will forgive him.”
“Yes. I think sometimes... If you value your relationship with another person enough, you have to be willing to accept that they are flawed. I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to make my father see the world, or me, the way that I want him to. I can keep showing him, though. And in the meantime I can live my life. But cutting him out of it completely wouldn’t fix the wound. It wouldn’t heal anything.”
“It might teach him a lesson,” Javier said.
“I think having to watch me join with you might have begun to teach him a lesson,” she said.
“What does that mean?” he growled.
“Only that you are a bit more feral and frightening than I think he imagined my royal husband might be.”
“The beast, remember?”
“Yes. I think... We are husband and wife now. And I would like to know... Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why did you become the beast? The sins of your father. We talked about that. But it’s deeper than that. I know it is. Because you changed when you found that little girl...”
“What do you think I was doing all those years before? I was seeing to his orders. Arresting men when he demanded that I arrest them. And women. Separating families as he commanded. And he would tell me it was for a reason. Because they were traitors. Because it was upholding the health of the country. But I realize now they were freedom fighters. People who wanted to escape his oppressive regime, and it was oppressive. That innocent people were put behind bars, tried and... I helped. I upheld his rule of law, and I regret it.”
“You didn’t know.”
“Maybe not. But when you have believed so wholeheartedly in a lie, you can never trust yourself again. You can never trust in the clarity of your own judgment because you have been so fooled. Because you were a villain and all the while imagined yourself a hero. And you will never, ever be able to walk through life without wondering which side you’re on again. You will never be able to take it for granted.”
“It takes such courage to admit that. You are brave. And I can see that you’ll never take the easy way. You can trust yourself.”
He shook his head. “No. I can’t. I love my father and I allowed those feelings to blind myself to his faults.”
“Well. So did I with mine.”
“Your father is not a maniacal dictator. As challenging as he might be.”
“No. I suppose not.” She put her hand on his face, and he closed his eyes, relishing the feel of her delicate fingers against him. “You saved that girl, Javier.”
“But so many more I did not save. So many I harmed myself. Arrested. Sent to a prison run by my father, where they were undoubtedly tortured. There is no salvation for such sins. My hands will not wash clean. But I can use them to serve.”
“I’m sorry, but I know you, Javier. You’re not a monster.”
“I must assume that I am,” he said, moving away. “The better to protect the world from any harm that I might do.”
“I don’t think you are,” she said.
“This is not a fairy tale. The things that I have done cannot be undone. I can only move forward trying to do right now that I understand. Now that I have the power. It is not about being transformed by magic. Such a thing is not possible.”
She moved to him and she bracketed his face with her hands.
He had no chance to respond to that, because she kissed his mouth, and he was dragged into the swirling undertow of desire by the softness of her lips, the slow, sweet sweep of her tongue against his. She was inexperienced, his beautiful goddess, but she had a sort of witchcraft about her that ensnared him and entranced him.
That made him fall utterly and completely under her spell.
How could the magic fail here? Because of him. That had to be it.
She was made entirely of magic. Glorious soft skin and otherworldly beauty wrapped around galaxies of light. She was something other than beauty. Something more.
Something that made his heart beat new and made him want to defy a lifetime of commitment to honor.