CHAPTER ONE - DEVYN
“Cut,” the director shouts from his position behind the camera after one of the production assistants rushes to his side, the quiet on the set quickly overtaken by the onlookers’ rising voices. I’ll never admit to anyone on the set how much I had been craving to end the scene. My vision is blurry from another night of binging on alcohol. Tessa has been trying to talk me into admitting myself into another rehab center, but I can’t bring myself to do it. I promised her I would find a new outlet – a safer way to let myself numb the pain. I traded stardom for drugs, then drugs for alcohol. My parents were the first things to go, that one was easy. But if left to my vices, I may not have anything to fall back on.
“Devyn.” The production assistant wipes his palms against his pants a few times as he approaches, trying to wick away any of the residual moisture. The squeaking of his sneakers on the concrete flooring pings against my growing headache. By his downcast eyes and sweaty palms, I can assume that he’s a fan of mine. I don’t see as many fans as I used to, girls and boys crying at every encounter when I was younger, but I do occasionally run into one on set when they grew up watching my show.
“Hey, Kenny.”
Stunned, the kid looks at me in awe; his eyes wide like coffee cup saucers against his oblong face. “You. . .you know my name?”
I begin to nod, but quickly I realize that the motion was a bad idea. It takes only a second for a roll of nausea to flip my stomach, and I have to bite back my curse to rush back to the small dressing room where I’ve hidden a bottle of vodka from everyone.
“You okay, Mr. Dane?”
My lips pull back in what I hope resembles a smile, but I’m certain is more of a sneer if the kid’s surprised expression is any indication.
“I’m fine, just hungry,” I point out by placing a hand on my stomach, though the thought of food elicits another wave of nausea in my gut. I suggest Kenny and I walk to the Craft table for a snack. I hope that a few carbohydrates and starches will settle my stomach.
“So, Kenny, what can I do for you?”
The kid stares at me as if I’ve grown two heads, but luckily his momentary lapse in judgment doesn’t last too long. I’ve always hated awkward silence, quickly followed by a forced conversation.
“Sorry. I was sent to tell you that your presence has been requested at The Film Festival in Lake Tahoe in two months. They’re going to premiere the film there.”
His request actually catches me by surprise. “Will it be finished and edited in time?”
“Definitely. I mean, we’re only working on reshoots right now. Most of the film is already complete.”
A film festival. My chance to make my debut back into the public eye. My chance to show everyone that I’m not the screw up they claim me to be.
“Cool, I should be able to make it work. Did you check with my personal assistant, Tessa? She knows my schedule better than anyone.”
Kenny blanches at my question and I can tell that he failed to speak with her. Normally I wouldn’t care, but Tessa runs a tight ship; even more so since I promised to end the nightly parties and blackouts, and to get my life back on track. I haven’t exactly been keeping up my end of the bargain.
Resting a hand lightly on his shoulder, I try to reassure him, if only to ease my own conscience. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll let her know. I need to check in with her anyway.”
The assistant visibly relaxes as he releases a sigh. “Thanks, Mr. Dane.”
“No sweat, Kenny. Do you know when we need to be back on set?”
“In fifteen.”
“Catch ya then.”
Two croissants from the table beckon me and I shove the buttery pastries into my mouth so fer
vently that the flaky crumbs feather down my black T-shirt. I walk toward the direction of the dressing room using the back of my hand to wipe away the crumbs on my chest. With my eyes cast downward, I miss the claw-like hand that reaches out for my arm to try and stop my movements. Her nails dig into my bicep as I keep walking and she’s forced to keep up at my pace.
“Devyn, I wanted to speak with you about the next scene they want to reshoot.”