But Maribelle had fallen silent.
“Mom . . . ?” There was something more, and Kacey braced herself. “What is it you’re not telling me?”
The starch seemed to drain out of Maribelle, and she returned to her spot on the couch. Her eyes were focused on the fire, but Kacey knew that she wasn’t seeing the golden flames licking the ceramic logs. No, her mind was far away, in a place that only she knew of, a spot that was in the distant past. “It wasn’t like that. You have to understand. He’s a fine, upstanding man. A pillar of the community, really. People look up to him. . . . Ours was an affair of the heart.”
She’d elevated her relationship to something pure and special and unique. Still. After over a third of a century.
“Everyone thinks that. That’s the reason people cheat on their spouses, because this new relationship is just so exciting and new.”
“But ours . . .” A beatific smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she remembered. She still believed what she and this man had shared was unique to the universe. Swallowing hard, Maribelle shot Kacey a hard look. “You wouldn’t understand. Couldn’t.”
“Don’t patronize me, Mom!” Kacey hated that she was a part of this, an integral part of this. “Who is he?”
A pause.
“Maribelle?”
“I promised myself that I would never say. And I’ve not broken that vow.”
“I’ll find out,” Kacey insisted. “And it’ll be worse if I have to go looking.”
Maribelle stared at her hands. “David doesn’t know.”
David Spencer. Her mother’s would-be boyfriend. “I won’t tell him,” Kacey stated flatly. “But if he finds out some other way, then there’s nothing I can do about it. I’m not going to live this lie another second!”
Maribelle spoke in a voice that was little more than a whisper. “You’re angry!”
“Angry and frustrated. You lied to me. All my damned life.”
“I’m sorry for that. Truly.” She blinked against tears. “It was different then. I was young. Impressionable . . .”
“Don’t forget married.”
Maribelle winced. “There were problems there, too. For one thing, I couldn’t get pregnant, not that I planned this, of course, but your father, er, Stanley and I . . . Our marriage was pretty rocky at that time. I was taking classes and met a medical student who was . . .” She let her voice drift off before finishing. “Well, he was everything Stanley wasn’t. We, um, became involved, and just when we decided to call things off, you were conceived.” She looked up at Kacey with tears glistening in her eyes. “I was so happy. I’d thought maybe I was barren, but I’d never been tested, nor had Stanley, and then there you were, a miracle baby!” She smiled a bit through her tears, lifted her hands. “It was a blessing. At least for me. Look at you. I wanted a baby so badly, and you were conceived!”
Kacey thought of the hardworking father she’d grown up with, the grandparents whose home she’d inherited, and everything seemed off, just half a step out of sync. “Dad will always be—”
“I know.” Maribelle snagged her glass and walked to her kitchen, where the bottle of pinot noir was breathing on the sleek granite counter she had installed just the year before. “Would you like a little?” she offered, rummaging in a cupboard for another glass.
Kacey shook her head. The last thing she needed was to think any less clearly than she already was. As Maribelle poured herself another drink, her hands trembling a bit, Kacey stood on the opposite side of the kitchen island. “So who is he, Mom?” Maribelle set the bottle aside. “I think I deserve to know.”
Her mother twisted the stem and watched the dark liquid swirl, then sniffed it before taking a sip. “I suppose you do,” she agreed finally. “I’ve often thought so, but I just couldn’t tell you.”
“You’d rather lie.”
“Avoid the truth. It got easier over time, harder to find a way to . . . Oh, well, I finally decided it was best to let it all die.”
“I need to meet him.”
She was startled. “Oh, no! He’s past all this now, and I don’t want you bothering him or his wife.”
“Wife?” Kacey repeated.
“Yes. Wife. Of what? Oh, I guess about forty-five years now,” she said with more than a trace of bitterness.
“I’ll find out who he is whether you tell me or not.”
“Fine!” Maribelle was angry, but she saw that Kacey was dead serious. Taking a deep breath, she said, “His name is Gerald Johnson.” She glanced up, as if the name would mean something to Kacey. When Kacey didn’t react, she added, “He’s a renowned heart surgeon who helped develop a special kind of stent, and no, he doesn’t know about you. I decided it wouldn’t do any good to tell him. Soon after he left his practice, he moved his family to Missoula.” She shrugged. “It’s common knowledge. You can find that out in seconds on the Internet, so I’m not divulging any secrets there, but please don’t bother him. He wouldn’t appreciate it, and neither would Noreen and her brood.”