When she says it aloud, it’s like a sharp dagger pierces my heart. “It was an accident.”
“But you were trying to murder someone?” Olivia presses further, forcing my hand. I don’t want to reveal a world to her that’s dark and terrifying, that would give her nightmares when she closes her eyes when going to bed.
“I don’t take what I do lightly,” I say. I’ve never killed anyone where it wasn’t justified. Although the law wouldn’t consider murder a just cause, we don’t operate within the lines of the law. The police tend to look the other way. We also don’t give them a lot to work with in terms of evidence.
We leave nothing behind.
That’s why there’d been a fire that night. I had all the evidence buried and burned.
Destroyed.
No one would ever know or tie me to the crime. But here I was, practically confessing my sins to Olivia Summers.
This was a dangerous game.
She was dangerous, pulling the truth from me, something that I hadn’t shared with anyone outside of the family. Ever.
“Are you wearing a wire?” I abruptly pull off to the side of the road. I unbuckle my seatbelt and yank her shirt open. The buttons fly off. I’ve been betrayed before, and I can’t help but doubt her questions and integrity.
“What the hell are you doing?” she shrieks. Olivia smacks my arms away. “Get off me!”
I do as she asks, only because there’s no evidence of a wire, no surveillance as far as I’m aware.
She’s clean.
I’m the one with my hands filthy.
“I’ll tell you everything, but only when we’re back at the compound.” I need to know with absolute certainty that my words can’t be used against me.
“And then?” she asks. “What happens to me?”
Does she fear for her life?
She should. Not that I’d ever harm a hair on her head, but it doesn’t make me any less of a monster. Once she learns the truth, it can’t be unheard. Pandora’s box is open.
“Luka could potentially come after you again.” While I don’t think he will, he won if his end game was divulging my secret to destroy me.
“He won’t,” Olivia whispers, as confident as I am that he’s done what he intended. The damage is severe. Everlasting.
“Even so, I’ve set you up with an apartment in the city. The building will have private security, and you’ll be safe.”
She exhales a heavy sigh. “Safe like the last time, when I had some creep snooping on me?”
I grimace and fall back into my seat. I fasten my seatbelt and return onto the road. “That was different. It was Luka’s men watching you.”
We both think he’s done. He’s had his fun. At least I want to believe the game of chasing Olivia and hunting her down is over. He caught her. I lost.
And while I might have lost, she’s still alive. And for that, I’m eternally grateful.
She’s silent as I drive us back to the compound. Just as we reach the complex, she glances at me. “I was falling in love with you,” she whispers, staring at me.
My heart hammers in my chest.
Yeah, me too.
But there’s no sense in wasting air telling her I’m sorry or that I feel the same way. Apologies are meaningless. They’re for the weak. And let’s face it, nothing I say or do can fix all the shit I’ve caused and the damage I’ve done.
I fucked up.