“Ouch.” I mocked being hurt. “Coming from you, that means… absolutely nothing, actually.” I took a sip from my drink, not saying anything else for a while. This was starting off on the wrong foot, and I had to salvage the conversation, somehow. “How long have you been Giselle’s shadow?”
“Why so curious?” he shot back, his frown deepening.
“Isn’t it obvious?” My eyes landed on Giselle, who stood alone near the fire still. One of the younger heirs tried talking to her, but she wasn’t receptive to him, so he got the hint and wandered off. “She’s not like anyone I’ve ever met. She’s gorgeous, yeah, but there’s something else about her that just… draws me in, I guess.” The more I talked, the more I could feel the man beside me prickling, as if he did not enjoy listening to me go on and on about her.
Hmm. Did Zander like her? That had to be a mess. I doubted her father would ever let her date someone who worked for him.
When he continued to say nothing, I had to say, “Don’t tell me you like her.”
His gaze narrowed, and he glared at me like he’d never glared before. Like, if he could, he would gladly put a bullet in my brain and walk away, never again sparing a single thought about me.
“Oh, my God. You do. You like her.”
“I do not,” he hurriedly spoke, and the fact that he hurried up to say it only made me realize how much of a liar Zander was. He must’ve known I saw through his shit, for he added, “I don’t. And, even if I did, it wouldn’t matter. She’s on her own level. I’m just a worker bee, doing what he’s told.”
“But if, say, her father told you to go for it, would you?” His silence right then was all I needed to hear. “I should be surprised, but I’m not.” Now it was my turn to stare at Giselle. “If I had to follow her around constantly, spend hours with her every day, I’d be in the same boat as you.” Hell, it felt like I was kind of in that boat now. I wanted to get to know her more, and Giselle wanted absolutely nothing to do with me.
We stood there for a while, for a long while. I didn’t know what else to say to him, but to my surprise, it was Zander who broke the silence first: “If anyone ever asks me about you, I’ll deny this, but… you’re not half as annoying as you first come across.”
I wasn’t sure if I should thank him or be insulted. So, instead, I settled with saying, “Same, dude. Same.”
“I’m not annoying.”
“Well, that depends on who’s being asked, doesn’t it?”
Zander’s jaw set, and he glared at me yet again. I had the feeling he’d do a whole lot more glaring at me, anytime we were together. He might not like me, but it wasn’t the first time someone didn’t like me. A lot of people tended to make snap judgments about me because they thought they knew who I was since they knew my father.
I was not like my father. We weren’t the same. We wanted different things. My father wanted domination, and I… what did I want? I didn’t know. All this time, I’d been content to go along with my father’s plans, to do what he needed me to do, all the while living it up and having a bit of fun here and there—have fun while I could, because once I was married off, all that fun would stop. That’s what my thought process was, anyway.
But maybe that wasn’t how things should be.
During the talk with Zander, Nixon Hawke had shown up. He stuck to the outer rim of the occupied area, much like Zander and I currently did. I had to leave Zander’s side, mostly because I was done talking to the guy. He wasn’t going to tell me anything about Giselle, so why should I waste my time with him when I could be with her instead?
I walked up to Giselle, standing beside her as she watched the flames. “What are you thinking about?” I asked, and when I spoke, she didn’t spare a glance in my direction. It was like the fire held all of her attention. What I wouldn’t give to peer into that head of hers and see where she was at, what she was thinking.
Did she hate me? Did I have absolutely no chance with her?
If that was the case, would I give up? Nah, but at least then I’d know where I stood with her. I’d just have to be a little more persistent.
At first, I thought she was so lost in her own head she didn’t hear me, but after a moment, Giselle whispered, “I’m wondering what it’d be like to be normal. To be at a party with classmates instead of… the heirs of a criminal organization.” She pursed her lips. “I’m wondering what life would be like if I didn’t have to constantly worry about what I do, what I say, how I hold myself.” Finally, she turned her head in my direction, meeting my eyes. “Don’t you ever get tired of it?”
I opened my mouth, but no words came out. Mostly because I didn’t know what to say. Giselle looked and sounded so… genuine when she’d said she wondered what it was like to be normal. Personally, I kind of liked being different from everyone else. Sometimes it was hard, we had to make choices other people our age didn’t have to make, but that put us a cut above the rest.
That’s why we were here.
She took my silence as my answer. “Of course you don’t. You’re a guy. It’s always different for you. You can play around, dip your dick in whatever girl you want, and not have to worry about any consequence. You’re worth more. Why else would all the heirs here be males? If my father had a son, you can bet your ass he’d be here instead of me.” She must’ve finished her drink, or she was done with it, for she then threw it into the fire, her feelings more than evident.
That was how she felt? No wonder she walked around, acting like she did. She thought she was lesser, not as important as us. She had more weight on her shoulders because she was a girl. She had more to prove.
I understood where she was coming from, why she’d feel like that, and I wished I could help her. I wished I could make her see that just because she was a girl did not automatically mean she meant less than us. It wasn’t right.
“I need some air,” she said, and then she turned away from me, away from the fire, and walked away. Giselle stalked into the forest, walking past Zander, who tried to go after her, but she held up a hand in his direction, shooting a glare at him, and he stopped. She wanted to be alone right now, and she would—at least until she calmed down. I hoped that was sooner rather than later.
Everyone who had arrived had congregated into pairs or small groups, chitchatting amongst themselves. I thought about going after her, but I didn’t want her to lash out at me. I didn’t know how to comfort her, or what she wanted to hear. As much as I wanted to know Giselle better, I didn’t know her nearly enough to chase after her.
So I didn’t. I stood there, my gaze slow to return to the fire.
It must’ve been quite the commotion, because after a little while, Cade Cunningham had rounded the bonfire, now standing beside me. “You must’ve pissed her off,” he muttered, his voice quiet. I hardly heard it over the crackling of the flames. The bonfire had already eaten a lot of the wood I’d put into it; I’d have to feed the flames again soon enough.