"Because it's easier this way," she whispers, her voice shaking. She slips her hand back into her lap, which makes me want to grab it and put it right back on my dick. "You wanted to kiss me because I was there, Jax. I wanted you to kiss me because it's what I've always wanted. I've only ever wanted you."
"You think I don't want you the same?" I ask, running my nose up and down the side of her face because I can't stop myself. I desperately want to lay her back and show her exactly how much I want her, but I've finally got her talking. I'm not going to stop her until she gets it all out there. We need to resolve this now.
"I…I don't know. I'm sure you've had other…opportunities."
"I haven't been with anyone since the day I met you, rabbit," I growl, pissed she thinks I've been unfaithful to her. Even when I couldn't have her, I was faithful to her. I will always be faithful to her. If it's not Jessa, it'll be no one. "You're the only thing on this fucking planet that I want, the only thing my dick gets hard over."
"Jax," she gasps, turning to face me again. Her eyes are wide and dilated. "You're serious?"
"Have I ever lied to you?"
"I…I…"
"Why are you running, rabbit?" I ask again, watching those walls of hers crumble.
"I don't want to lose you," she blurts, her eyes filling with tears. "You matter to me. You matter to my mom and to Cyrus. If we…did anything, and it didn't work out, you'd lose your family and I'd lose you. I can't lose you."
"Why are you so sure you'd lose me?" I ask, scooting closer, until there's not enough room for even the tiniest atom to fit between us.
"We want different things," she whispers, blinking rapidly to keep from crying. "You don't want kids, but I do, Jax. I want them so damn much. So we can't be together because it wouldn't work out."
"Jessa–"
"I'm in love with you." She gasps and slaps her hand over her mouth, staring at me in shock.
Her declaration hits me like a bomb blast, wrecking me.
"I've been in love with you basically since I met you," she whispers, speaking rapidly, as if she's afraid if she doesn't say it all now, she'll lose the nerve. "I know you don't feel the same way, and that's okay, Jax. You can't make your heart feel something it doesn't. But I do feel that. If we tried this and it didn't work out, it would crush me. So it's better for everyone if we don't even go there. I'm sorry I've been avoiding you. That wasn't fair of me because it's not your fau–"
I press my mouth to hers, silencing her before she talks her way right out of my life. That isn't happening. Not today or any other day. If she's afraid I'll leave her, I clearly haven't done right by her. If she thinks for a second that I wouldn't give her as many babies as she wants and love every single one of them with my whole heart, I've royally fucked up. But I can't say that right now, because feeling her lips against mine is a type of beautiful I don't deserve.
Her lips are soft. I taste the fruity, tangy seltzer on her breath. But underneath that, I taste her, the woman I've been in love with for four years. The one I'd die for, no questions asked. I kiss her hard, pouring everything into it. My hand sinks into her hair, turning her head so I can kiss her deeper.
She's tentative at first, hesitant to kiss me back. And then she whimpers. Her body goes soft and pliant in my arms. Our containers hit the floor as I drag her into my lap. She grips my shoulders, clinging to me as I claim her mouth like it belongs to me. It does belong to me, and it's about time she knows it.
I pull her glasses off and toss them toward the coffee table and then do the same with mine so they're out of the way. I run my hands all over her body then, touching all those places I haven't ever been allowed to touch before. Those rules no longer apply. Cyrus can hate me. Their mom can disown me. I'll miss the hell out of them. But there's not a thing in this world that's going to stop me from making Jessa mine. I should have done it long before now.
I grip her bubble butt in my hands, growling. The rest of her is soft and sweet, but not this ass. It's round and firm, begging for me to spank and fuck it, to worship it on my knees. One day soon, I'll do all three.
For now, I use my grip on her to grind her against my cock.
She throws her head back, crying out my name.
And fuck if that isn't the prettiest sound I've ever heard.
"Say my name like that again, Jessa," I demand, greedy to hear it again. I bury my face in her tits, trying to kiss them both at once. Her hard nipples are enough to make me crazy. I rip her shirt, not even sorry about it. It's between me and what I want.
Her grip on my shoulders tightens, my name leaving her lips again.
I yank her bra down, growling when it resists. Before I can tear it off her body, she lets me go long enough to help me move it out of the way. Her tits spring free from the top. I nearly cum in my pants at the sight of her nipples. They're fat little cherries against her alabaster skin.
I kiss the right one, and then bite the left one. She whines and wriggles, restless as I touch all those places I've dreamed about for years. Her tits are incredible. They're even better with my marks on them. I kiss and bite and suck until she's practically sobbing my name.
"These are mine now," I growl to her, just in case that isn't clear yet. When I pull back to look at her, her eyes are so dilated and dazed, I'm not sure she's hearing anything. She's too turned on, needs me to make her come too badly.
I slip my hands into her pants. Whoever invented leggings was a genius. Not only do they make her ass look phenomenal and let me catch glimpses of her pussy lips, but they make it so easy for me to get inside them. They leave plenty of room for me to work with.
Her panties tie at her hips. I jerk one of the ties free, allowing me to slip my hand inside. She's soaked, her folds coated with her sticky juices. She's also bare, her lips soft and smooth.
"Who did you shave this for?" I growl, jealous as hell to think someone else has been looking at my pussy, touching my pussy. I press my thumb to her clit and jiggle it. "Who, rabbit?"
"No one!" she shouts, writhing on my lap. "I like the way it feels."
"So do I." And I'm about to make it feel a hell of a lot better. "You ever let anyone touch your pussy before, Jessa? Let anyone play with this juicy cunt?"
She shakes her head rapidly back and forth.
"Good," I murmur. No one else will ever touch it or kiss it. No one else will ever fuck it. She thinks I could ever let her go? She's wrong. There will never be another man for her. Her world will start and end with me, just like mine does with her. Whatever she wants, I'll give her. If she needs to come, I'll be the one to get her off.
"Jax," she whimpers when I jiggle her clit again.