Chapter twenty-three
After the dinner party from hell, Grey called off all social events involving the Brotherhood as often as he could. If I thought I was confined to the house before, it was nothing compared to now. He claimed he wasn’t taking any chances, and I wasn’t feeling brave enough to argue with him.
Our only public appearances were the occasional fundraiser and one ballet that reminded me of Tatum. I cried the whole drive home. We never did that again.
Mrs. McTavish did manage to sneak me out of the house once over the next year to help me shop for Grey’s birthday. I bought him a gold watch with a quote engraved on the back.
Hero: an ordinary person who finds strength in extraordinary circumstances.
Grey once told me he wasn’t a hero.
I needed to remind him that heroes came in all shapes and sizes.
Today was a typical Saturday spent in the library with one of the classics. This week it wasJane Eyre. I’d already read it three times since I’d been here.
I hadWuthering Heightsnearly memorized word-for-word by now. My heart had a soft spot for Heathcliff. My brokenness was drawn to his brokenness.
“I’m going back to New York next week. I just thought you should know.” Caspian stood in the doorway of the library. His voice startled me. Mrs. McTavish hadn’t even told me he was here.
I stood up from the couch and walked over to him. “Are you going to see her?”
He simply nodded.
It felt like I was saying goodbye to Tatum and that tore me to pieces. I didn’t even bother blinking back my tears. “Take good care of her for me, okay?”
I wanted to beg him to take me with him, but I knew it wouldn’t do any good. He’d already told me this was my life. I’d even begun to tell that to myself.
Caspian swallowed but didn’t smile. He rarely smiled. Then he nodded in agreement. “Until the day I die.”
I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed with all my might whether he wanted me to or not. I wasn’t ready to let go, not yet. Having him here was the only thing keeping me sane. Seeing him made me feel like Lyric in a life that only knew Lauren. Without Caspian, I was nothing. I was no one.
Grey stepped behind me and pried my arms from Caspian’s body. I thought I heard him say, “I’ll be in touch. You know what you have to do.” But I was too lost in a storm of emotion to be sure.
He tried to hold me, but I fell to my knees as I watched the last trace of my old life walk out the door.