38
Dillon
“Remember, you can’t say anything,” I tell Ma as I hold my mobile phone out in front of me. “Keep it casual.”
“I just want to say hello to the little guy, Dillon. Not give him the Spanish Inquisition.” She rolls her eyes, and I really miss the fuck out of her. “When do you think you’ll tell him?”
“Soon, I hope.” I have a plan, which I hope Viv will agree to. Finding the right time to raise it with her is the issue. I don’t want to spring it on her at the last minute because that fucked everything up the last time in Ireland. But the timing has to be spot-on so she won’t overreact and tell me to take a hike. Things are perfect right now, and I don’t want to mess anything up.
“Will you be bringing him home for Christmas?”
I rub the back of my neck, hating to do this to her. “About that.”
Her face falls, and I feel like shit.
“Lauren and Jon didn’t make it back for Thanksgiving today, but they’ll be back for Christmas, and they want us to go there for dinner. It’s tradition for all of them to go to the Millses’ house, and it will be hard enough for East as it is. I don’t want to do anything to upset him.”
“It’s okay, love. I understand. We’ll miss you, but there’ll be other Christmases.”
“I’m sorry, Ma. I hate to be missing it, but I can’t leave Vivien alone at Christmas. It’s going to be tough on her.” I know Reeve’s loss will hit her hard then, and I need to be with her to help her get through it.
“I’m very proud of you, Dillon.”
I arch a brow because I’ve done a lot of bad shit in the past. Things they only discovered when Reeve died, so I think saying she’s proud is a bit of a stretch.
“You made mistakes, but you’re atoning for them,” she adds, seeing the incredulous expression on my face.
I’ve finally realized what Viv has been saying is true. Instead of focusing on revenge, I’m grateful for the life I’ve had. For the life I’m living. I know how fortunate I am to have my family and to have grown up surrounded by love. I took that for granted before. I only thought about the life that had been taken from me, not the one I was gifted. I didn’t believe I was the lucky one, but I was wrong all along. It took letting go of my anger for me to see the truth.
“Every night, I say a prayer for you and Vivien and Easton,” Ma continues, dragging me out of my head. “I knew the instant I met that girl that she was the one for you. I knew she was the girl you’d end up marrying, and I’m glad I wasn’t wrong.”
“Steady on, Ma, and don’t go saying that shit to Viv.”
She sighs. “Dillon, do you think I was born yesterday? I know better than to put my foot in it.” She rolls her eyes. “Now go and put my cute little grandson on the line so I can wish him a Happy Thanksgiving.”
“How did she take the news?” Viv asks as Easton says hello to my parents and extended family in Ireland via FaceTime. It helps that Ro is there as he knows him, but I’m sure he’s wondering who the hell the rest of the freaks are. Ash is beside East, introducing him to everyone, and he’s delighted with all the attention.
“She was a little disappointed, but she understands.”
Viv chews on the corner of her lip, and I sneak my hand under the table, squeezing her fingers. “Stop worrying.”
“I feel bad that you’ll be away from your family at Christmas.”
“But I won’t be.” I peer into her eyes. “I’ll be with you and Easton. You’re my family now.”
She gives me a wobbly smile, and I’m guessing today is as hard for her as Christmas will be. This time last year, she was pregnant and celebrating with her husband.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”
“Don’t be sorry, Dillon. You’ve got nothing to be sorry for.” She glances at Easton to ensure he’s not looking before planting a quick kiss on my lips. “And you’re right. We are your family, and I’m lucky to get to do this with you. It’s just hard today. I’m feeling a little sad.”
I slide my arm around her shoulders, holding her tight. “I know, sweetheart, and I’m here for you.”
* * *
Thanksgiving was harder than I thought it would be. Easton threw a few temper tantrums, and Vivien wore a sad smile on her face half the time, but we got through it. I yanked them out of bed this morning to go hiking at Pelican Cove Park because I want to do something fun today to put a smile back on both their faces.
The weather is cooler at this time of year, and Viv and Easton wrap up warm. My Irish bones don’t need as much insulation, so I take a light jacket, and we head out up the coastal road.