45
Vivien
Shocked silence filters through the cabin. Ronan drags his hands through his hair as he stands. “I’m really sorry I did it. I have felt enormous guilt for years, but it was worse when we found out about Easton. Especially now I’m a father.”
“Why did you do it?” I ask, circling my arms around Dillon’s waist because I can tell he’s on the verge of doing something he’ll regret.
Ro lifts his eyes to his brother’s. “I knew you were in love with her, and I could see it on your face. I knew you were ready to quit the band for her.”
Dillon sneers. “Pull the other one, brother. You always had the hots for her. Admit you were jealous.”
He vigorously shakes his head. “I’ll admit I was jealous when you first hooked up, but I got over it. That wasn’t the reason.” His Adam’s apple jumps in his throat. “We were so close to making it, and the band would never have gotten signed without you. You’re the star, Dillon. You always have been. I couldn’t let you throw it all away.”
“That wasn’t your decision to make, Ro,” Dillon grits out. His body is visibly shaking with rage.
“I was young and dumb. I knew you loved her, but I didn’t know it was forever love. I thought you’d get over her, especially once we made it big and there were women throwing themselves at you. But I was wrong. I’ve had to watch you suffer and press the self-destruct button, knowing it was all my fault.”
“Why didn’t you fess up?” Ash asks.
Ronan rolls his neck from side to side. “I wanted to, but the longer it went on, the harder it got. Then Vivien married Reeve, and I knew there was no undoing the damage.”
“You’re a fucking asshole,” Dillon snaps. “You should’ve told me when I told you Easton was my son. That was the time to come clean.”
“I wanted to, but I couldn’t. I was going through my own shit, and—"
“You’re a fucking selfish prick!” Dillon lunges for Ronan, grabbing him by the shirt and shoving him against the side of the plane. “I lost five years with my son!” he yells. “Years I could’ve been around for if I had gotten Vivien’s letter and stopped her from getting on that plane. I will never forgive you for this.” He shoves him. “Never.”
“Stop.” I step in between them, pushing them apart. “What you did was selfish and manipulative,” I tell Ronan, “but I understand your motivations, and youwereyoung.”
“That doesn’t excuse him,” Dillon snaps.
I turn to face my boyfriend. “No, it doesn’t, but Ronan is the one who will have to live with that for the rest of his life.” My features soften, and I let Ro go, sliding both hands up Dillon’s chest. “I could just as easily say this is my fault for not giving the letter to Ash to deliver to you or handing it to you myself.”
“Why didn’t you?” Ash asks.
I glance between her and Dillon. “I mean no offense, Ash, but I wanted Dillon to make the decision free of interference and influence. If he came to stop me from getting on that plane, I needed to know it was solely his choice because I was prepared to completely change my life for him, and I needed to know he was all in.”
She nods slowly. “That makes sense.”
“Why did you put it through the letter box?” Dillon says. “Why not hand it to me personally?”
I arch a brow. “You honestly have to ask me that?” He looks confused. Typical man. “I thought Aoife was in there with you, and I couldn’t handle another rejection. I told you I loved you in the bar, and you acted like it meant nothing. I was broken-hearted, Dillon, and I couldn’t face seeing you with her again.”
He bobs his head. “It was natural to assume that, except she wasn’t with me.”
“I know that now, but I didn’t back then.”
“God, it’s all so tragic.” Ash shakes her head. “All these little things conspired to keep you apart.”
“I know, but what’s the point in looking back? We can’t change the past.” I cup one side of Dillon’s face. “The truth is, we don’t know what would’ve happened if you’d gotten that letter. Maybe you would have come after me, or maybe you were too drunk and you still would’ve gotten on that plane the next day and everything would have played out as it did.”
“Or maybe I would have fought harder for you, knowing you had chosen me.”
“But would you?” I peer deep into his eyes. “I hurt you by running straight back to Reeve. That hurt would still have been there.”
A muscle pops in his jaw. “I would’ve come after you and stopped you getting on the plane. That would have stopped everything from happening.”
“I’m not so sure, Dil.” Ash gets up, crossing to us. “You were stoned, drunk and incoherent, and so full of anger and bitterness. I would have encouraged you to go after her, but honestly, I think you’re too stubborn to have made that call until you had sobered up.”