“You’ll miss him every Christmas, darling.” She walks to me, giving me a hug. “But this one will be especially hard because it’s the very first one you have spent without him. Don’t be too hard on yourself, and from what I’ve seen, Dillon understands.”
“He does. He’s been amazing. He really has.”
“I’m happy to have been proven wrong about him. I saw the video last night, and I’m so proud of you, Vivien. I know it’s not easy putting yourself out there, but you can’t let these people destroy your happiness. Watching you defend yourself and your family yesterday brought tears to my eyes. You were so dignified.”
“Dillon encourages me to be brave, and I didn’t hesitate to defend myself.”
“He’s good for you, and you’re different with him. I see you coming to life again and that’s all I want for you. It’s what Reeve would want too.”
Dinner is a lively affair, and Easton is the center of attention. We FaceTime the O’Donoghues, and it’s an experience. It’s nighttime there, and they have a houseful of family and friends over. Drink is flowing, and they are all in good spirits. Easton is already begging me to take him to Ireland, and if Dillon wasn’t leaving to go on tour in ten days, I would suggest we book a trip.
But he is, and I don’t want him to go.
“You look like you could use this,” Dillon says, coming up alongside me as I stare out the window of my parents’ sunroom, looking at the old oak tree that holds so many memories. The others are playing board games with Easton in the living room, and I broke away, needing a few minutes alone. I should have known it wouldn’t take Dillon long to find me.
I take the champagne flute from his hand. “Thank you.”
He circles his arms around me from behind, and I lean back against his solid chest. “You can talk to me. I know you’re missing him.”
“This is the very first Christmas I’ve spent without him. I have lived twenty-five Christmases with him by my side. I feel disconnected without him here.” Tears spill down my cheeks because I don’t have the energy to hide them anymore. “These last few years, Reeve was actually very quiet at Christmas, and I longed to remove the sad look I always saw on his face.”
Dillon brushes my tears away with his thumb. “You mentioned that before. The night in the nursery.”
I nod, remembering. “We broke up on Christmas Day, and I know it played on his mind every year.” A sob rips from my throat as I think back to that horrible Christmas. No wonder Reeve got upset. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, hating to do this to him.
“Don’t be sorry, Viv. I always want to hear what you’re feeling and thinking.” He tightens his arms around me.
I lean back, angling my head to press a soft kiss to his lips. “You love me so well, Dillon, and I feel like you get nothing in return.” He must be so sick of my mood swings and my tears. I know I am.
“Are you kidding me? You give me everything just by breathing, Viv.” He kisses the tip of my nose. “You made today so special for me. The photo album of Easton with all of your memories and written notes will help me to feel close to both of you on the tour. I can’t wait to hang the framed family photo of us over my mantelpiece, and don’t get me started on that Bob Dylan Martin D-28. I can’t believe you got that for me.”
It cost me a small fortune at the charity auction, but it was worth it to see the look of shock and sheer awe on Dillon’s face when he realized who it used to belong to.
“But best of all is the gift of my son and this second chance with you.”
I spin around in his arms, drying my tears. “I feel so lucky to have you in my life. Thank you for loving me, Dillon.”
“Thank you for letting me.”
We return to the others, hand in hand, and like always, Dillon has managed to clear the cobwebs from my head and add a smile to my face.
Mention of the tour has my mind churning with ideas. I meant what I said back there. Dillon has given so much of himself, going out of his way to prove his love for me and Easton, and I feel I need to make some grand gesture to let him know how much I appreciate and love him. The perfect idea pops into my head, and a bubble of excitement bursts in my chest. I wish I’d thought of it before, because I’m not sure if I can pull it off on such short notice. I don’t want to get Dillon’s hopes up if I can’t make it happen.
I need to talk to my Irish bestie. If anyone can help me to turn it into reality, it’s Aisling O’Donoghue.