Slinging the bag over his shoulder, he takes my hand, leading me toward a path. “I hate the thought of fame,” he admits, as we walk.
“That surprises me.” I admire the gorgeous scenery as we walk up an incline. “Because you own that stage. You have real stage presence. The natural kind. Not contrived. I think that’s why you have the audience eating out of your hand. They can’t help but be drawn to you.”
“When I’m up there, I feel like the truest version of myself, if that makes sense.”
I smile at a couple holding two toddlers in their arms as they pass by us. “It does,” I tell him, as we walk up gray stone steps. Everywhere I look, I see green. Grass. Shrubs. Gorse bushes. Trees. Plants. No flowers, but it’s still beautiful. “I can tell you’re happy. Your passion oozes from every pore when you’re entertaining a crowd.”
“I can’t reconcile that with the other side of fame.” He pulls me to one side to let an elderly couple pass, draping his arm around my shoulders. On instinct, I lean into his side, pressing my face into his neck, inhaling the citrusy scent of his shower gel. His lips nuzzle my hair, and I can’t get over how natural it is being with him like this.
“Is that why you’re not keen on moving to the US?” I surmise, when we commence walking again. His hand is solid and warm in mine, and quiet contentment blooms in my chest.
“That’s part of it.”
I’m quiet for a few beats as I think of how to respond. “I think you’re right to seriously contemplate what it’ll mean for your life. It would be a shame if you couldn’t make it work, because I think you’re extremely talented and the band is going places.”
“Is it possible to have success on the worldwide stage and hold on to your integrity, do you think? Can you have all this fame but still be yourself? Or is it too easy to get sucked into the machine?” He looks deadly serious as he casts a glance at me. “I know you’ve seen the nasty side of the industry, so I value your opinion.”
Wow, this is some heavy shit for a first date, but I’m glad he’s opening up to me. I’m quiet for many seconds as I work out how to explain my thoughts. “It is possible. I’ve seen it with my parents. There’s no denying their love and support kept them true, but as individuals, they are both strong.”
He nods, listening intently to my words as we ascend the hill.
“I think you can hold on to your integrity, but you need to be really strong-willed. You’ll have people pulling you in all kinds of directions, and if you don’t know your own mind, and you can’t stick to your resolve, you’ll get sucked in. It’s that easy.” I gnaw on the inside of my mouth, as bile churns in my gut. “Reeve swore he didn’t want the spotlight. That it was all about the acting for him. He promised nothing would change, and I believe he meant that. I believe he started out with those lofty aspirations, but it didn’t last long. I always thought he was strong, but it all unraveled so fast.”
“And he grew up in the business,” Dillon says after a few awkward beats of silence. “What hope do a bunch of naïve Irish boys from County Wicklow have?”
“If you ask me, I think it might be easier for you to hold on to your principles. You have a loving family who will help you to stay grounded, and you’re going in with your eyes wide-open. The fact you’re hesitant because you don’t want that side of fame is half the battle. The rest is down to how resilient and dogmatic you can be.”