7
The Island
We were moreor less silent on the way out to the small island, with Nathan focusing on rowing and me focused on watching him row. I sat in the back so I could steer, but I had to admit I had also planned to enjoy watching him sweat. And I was. He was wearing a white T-shirt that started clinging to his back as he rowed, his muscles bunching and flexing as he maneuvered the boat through the water.
Even his thighs and calves, at least the parts I could see from where I sat, were in incredible shape. The fact was, my stepbrother was not only handsome, but sexy as hell, too. The few pounds he’d added since we lived under the same roof in high school, had landed in all the right places.
I couldn’t say the same for myself, unfortunately.
If I thought Nathan was spending time with me because he actually wanted to enjoy my company, rather than feeling sorry for me, I’d have been flattered. And shocked. But I had no such delusions. I was just happy to look at him, and remember him, at least until the next family reunion.
The island was just as small as it looked from the shore—at most two hundred feet wide and heavily wooded. But Nathan, as if he knew the place, rowed around to the far side, which had a small beach to pull the row boat ashore with.
“Here, let me,” he said after we landed, hopping out of the boat to drag us onto the sand. Using a thin rope, he tied us off to a tree, then extended a hand to help me out.
“Let’s grab the snacks and see where that little path goes,” he said, gesturing to a narrow clearing I would never have noticed.
It was kind of weird, being there. I’d never hung out with him alone. Actually, I hadn’t hung out with him or his brothers much at all. Since we’d all grown up, we’d gone our separate ways. We’d been friendly for sure, but had never bothered to really develop a relationship. The birthday and Christmas presents that infrequently showed up at my door, I figured were the result of my mother’s badgering.
When I saw these guys at a family gathering, I’d say hi, talk to them for about five minutes, and make myself scarce. They hadn’t wanted to hang out with me when we were all under the same roof, and I figured it was too late to become buddies now.
Had I been wrong?
I grabbed the blanket Nathan had snagged and we walked into the trees. In what I estimated was roughly the middle of the little island was a clearing and a fire pit that looked like it hadn’t been used in a long time.
“Check this out,” Nathan said, doing a three-sixty degree turn. “Must have been some kids using this island to party or something.”
We spread out the blanket and plopped onto the soft ground, the sun dappled by the tree canopy overhead.
“Wow. This is great,” I admitted, kicking my shoes off and feeling somewhat normal for the first time in forever. “It’s quiet, too.”
“Mom’s music mix leaves a little to be desired, right?” he laughed.
“I almost died when Wham! came on.”
He offered me a wine cooler, something Mom had probably thought was perfect for a picnic, and I sipped at the light, fizzy drink. It wasn’t my taste at all, but I figured in my quest to create a new life, you had to try some new shit, right?
“She’s great, your mom. I hope she never changes,” he said.
“Well, I think you’re safe with that desire,” I replied, arranging myself cross-legged on the blanket. “It’s why I came today. I knew if I didn’t, she’d never give me a moment of peace.”
“You didn’t want to come?” he asked, sounding a little hurt. “Not even to see me?” he asked with a half-smile.
The half-smile that sent flutters through my stomach back when we were teenagers.
Was he flirting or something? With me?
Why?
No. It couldn’t be. The stupid wine cooler was already getting to me.
“I’ll tell ya, Nathan,” I said, flopping onto my back and looking up at the trees, “after what I’ve been through in recent weeks, I haven’t wanted to see anyone. Seriously. I think I’ve spent more time talking to my mailman and the Instacart delivery girl than anybody else.”
He lay down next to me, head propped on one hand, facing me.
It was… strange to have him so close. Not bad strange, but good strange. If that were a thing. His warm breath floated over to my bare arm. He smelled nice.
Just like he always had.