Chapter 9
Jaxon
Isighheavilyas I approach Finn’s office. I scrub my hands over my face and close my eyes for a moment. I could probably fall asleep standing up. Oh, the joys of single parenting. I make a mental note to grab some coffee on my way back to my office after this meeting.
Thankfully, Finn’s assistant’s desk is empty. Natasha is the last person I want to deal with right now. Her flirty advances are overkill. She might as well have a sign on her chest that says “will spread legs for anyone.”
I tap my knuckles twice on the closed door.
“Come in,” he shouts from the other side.
As I open the door, a female giggle echoes in the space.
Oh shit. I look up to see Finn sitting on the couch on the other side of his office with his wife in his lap.
“Finn, stop,” Lauren laughs, squirming in his arms.
I miss that—obviously not with Lauren, though.I’ve told myself over the years that I was fine being just me and Andy, but after watching my best friend be happy and in love, something in me has shifted and has made me wonder—what if?
I always wonder, What if Courtney hadn’t died? But lately, the what-if has turned into what if I had someone by my side, in my arms, in my bed? Would that be such a bad thing?
Suddenly, in front of me, I no longer see Lauren and Finn but a different Lawson twin sitting in my lap. Her dark hair thrown over one shoulder, exposing her skin for me to pepper kisses on as she laughs at my beard tickling her. The way her chocolate eyes would look up at me and lick her lips in anticipation of my lips claiming hers.
I blink rapidly, and that image disappears. Clearly, it’s the mental and physical exhaustion getting to me.
“What?” He glances over at me. “It’s just Jax.”
“Yeah, it’s just me,” I chuckle. My, how the tables have turned. I lost count of the number of times over the years that Finn had interrupted Court and me. At least these two are fully clothed.
“But it could’ve been any of your employees,” she added.
“But it’s not, babe, so just relax.” He presses a kiss to her temple, and she seems to relax. “Plus, three words—Conference. Room. Table.” Finn turns his attention back to me with a devilish glint in his eye and an arched brow.
I place my hands in my pockets and shrug.
“Okay,” Lauren draws out. “I don’t know what that means and think it’s better that way.” She’s probably right. Finn and I had been working late for weeks on a new project, and it felt like forever that I had spent time with Court. So she stopped by one evening wearing sexy lingerie, and we snuck off to the conference room for, well, a moment. Just as Court sank down on my cock, Finn walked into the room. No one said anything, but we all made eye contact before he bolted from the room.
“I can come back later. I should’ve called to make sure now was a good time.”
Finn goes to speak, but Lauren cuts him off. “It’s okay. I was just leaving. I have to meet Kate. We’re grabbing some last-minute items for Dani’s shower.”
“Do you have to?” Finn whines and nuzzles his face into his wife’s neck.
I cover my mouth with my fist to hide my laughter. My best friend is a damn lovesick puppy.
She pushes off him and stands. She brushes her hands down the front of her clothes, straightening her outfit. Lord knows what I would have walked into had I waited a few more minutes.
“Chill out, ya big baby. I’ll see you home in a few hours.”
“Fine,” he pouts. He pushes to his feet, pulling her into his arms, and presses his lips to hers in a passionate kiss. Get a room. I spin around to give them a private moment and walk over to the built-in shelves in the far corner of his office. On one shelf, I notice a framed photo of Finn and me standing in front of one of the first buildings we ever designed together. That feels like a lifetime ago, especially because Courtney was the one who took the photo.
“Good to see you, Jax,” Lauren says behind me.
I glance over my shoulder just as she’s walking out the door. “Bye.”
“So, what’s going on, man?” Finn asks as he rounds his desk and takes a seat.
“Umm, you said you wanted to meet me and Kels to go over things today at one.”
“Oh shit, you’re right. Damn, is it one already?”
I sink into one of the chairs across from him, resting my head back and closing my eyes.
“You look tired, man.”
His words force my attention back to him.
I let out a sadistic chuckle and adjust in the chair so I’m now leaning forward with my elbows resting on my knees. Tired doesn’t even cover how I’m feeling.
“Court used to say that when someone says you look tired, it’s the polite way of saying you look like shit.”
Finn smirks. “I remember. I just thought I would be nicer by saying you look tired than you look like shit.”
“Since when did you beat around the bush about anything? Well, minus your true feelings for Lauren.”
He holds his finger out at me. “Touché.”
Finn spent years pining over Lauren, and it wasn’t until he lost his dad and came back to the East Coast that he got his head out of his ass and went after what he wanted. “No, it’s just all the traveling back and forth.” When I had agreed for Denise to watch Andy, we were supposed to be living closer, not on the other side of town. “I feel like I’m constantly on the road. I leave even earlier to get Andy to your mom’s.”
Finn remains silent as I talk.