Chapter 3
Harlow
I’m gonna kill him, then I’m going to cut off his head and bring it home. I’ll keep it as a fucking trophy, and use it as a message to all the fuckers who think they might want to try their hand at taking me on. It’ll tell them not to bother to try to come back from the depths of Hell in hopes of dragging me back down there with them, because they’ll be going back down alone, and worse off than before. I’ll also make some special request with the devil on some fun, inventive things to fuck them up the ass with too.
I’m lying on the bed in the little prison cell that I’ve come to call home for the past... I don't know, maybe a little over a week? The fucker was nice enough to give me a newspaper a few days ago. I’ve only read the stupid thing at least a hundred times. From the date on it, I’ve been gone for at least a week.
In the past, when I was held like this, I had Evie. We worried about each other when we were apart, but at the end of the day, no matter what fucked up, sick, and twisted things we had to endure that day, we always saw each other when the other was returned to our cell.
But here, I’m alone. I don’t like it. There's way too much time for my mind to wander. At first, I was able to distract myself. Sure, most of that time it was me talking to myself about all the fun things I wanted to do to Triver when I killed him, but it was a distraction.
After a while, I ran out of things to think of to get my mind off of the real world, and it started to wander to the people who have affected my life in such a powerful way. A way that I never wanted to allow. But now, I wonder what took me so fucking long.
You only get one life, and as someone who can take one away in the blink of an eye, I shouldn’t be taking mine for granted.
I was ready, you know? To knock down that last wall, let them all flood my heart and soul. And to just accept that I have a group of people who love me. People who want me safe, happy, and cared for. Who don’t judge me because I’m different, because I’m bloodthirsty, and sometimes a little depraved. They didn’t see a broken girl who was abused her whole life, but someone who took that pain and made herself into a motherfucking queen.
Axel was my last battle, and just when we are able to start something like we should have months ago, the asshat upstairs thinks it's a good idea to kidnap me.
Now, all I can think about is how they’re handling my disappearance. I know Beast is probably keeping them busy, knowing he would need to pretty much be caged after what he did when I went on my little vacation. I just hope that Neo is in the back of their mind in his own little world of blood and hot, dirty sex with me.
Evie needs to be okay. She needs to be safe and back home with them or I don’t think I’ll be the same when I get out of here.
I know Dean is probably going out of his mind right now with the lack of control in this situation. We’ve been doing so well with him opening up for me. I hope he doesn’t regress, losing all the progress he’s made so far.
Axel has Sam, and so does Evie. I’m so grateful because there's something about that man that just changes you. He makes you want to be softer, quieter, to get to know the world on a different level. To take things slow, and see what's around you.
Then there’s Cass. I know he's putting on a brave face for everyone. He’s the leader of this family, the one who keeps things civil and humane. Who reminds us how to love, and what really matters in life - each other. He’s going to be hiding his pain and his worry from not only the guys and Evie, but from Rosie, too.
Fuck, I miss my sweet, sassy little spitfire so much. I wonder what he’s told her? Has he told her the truth, or that I went on a vacation and I’d be back soon? Is she mad at me because I can’t do our nightly video chats, like I do whenever I have to be away from home? Even when it’s just for a day. Whatever he’s told her, I just hope she knows I didn’t abandon her. That I’ll do everything in my power to get home to her. That I love her with my whole heart and nothing will keep me away from her, her daddy, and her uncles.
As much as I’m sure she misses me, I know she's the one who's probably taking this the best, but that’s because I don’t think Cass would tell her the truth. She’s a smart girl, but she's still only five. I want that girl to stay as innocent as possible for as long as she can.
Being locked up by Triver the first time required me to shut off most of my mind, only leaving just enough of myself for Evie’s sake. But these guys, they opened me up again. They showed me I was worthy of love, that it’s okay to feel, and to love in return. That they wouldn’t hurt me like they did in the past.
So now, laying here in this bed with nothing but this thin blanket and the only sound coming from the dripping sink across the room, I find myself cold and lonely. I need to be wrapped up in one of their arms, knowing I’m okay. That need is so fucking strong, it scares me.
Opening myself up and being so raw with them has also opened me up to be vulnerable to others. I know they didn’t mean for that to happen. I didn’t mean for that to happen, either, but it has.
I need to shut my mind off and go into survival mode if I want to make it out of here alive. Pushing them to the back of my mind might be the only way to keep a clear head.
So, when Triver opens the door for the first time today, I tuck Harlow away like Beast does Neo, and let Queenie take the reins like she does so well.
“Get up,” he demands, turning the light off to the basement.
“I was reading,” I grumble, folding the newspaper and putting it to the side. He always shuts the lights off when he comes down here, never wanting me to see him, like he's hiding something. At night, the moonlight that shines through the tiny window isn’t enough to make out anything but his shape either.
“Read later. Right now, it's supper time,” he says, making his way over to my cell.
“If it's more of those cardboard sandwiches, no thanks.”
“It’s not,” he snaps. “Stick your arms through the bars.”
My brows shoot up. “What, why?”
“So I can cuff you,” he sighs, sounding impatient. You would think by now he’d have learned that I’m not gonna make any of this easy on him. He's gonna give himself an ulcer from getting strung out so easily.
“Sorry, but I’m not in the mood for some kinky play time,” I snark back.