It was time to stop running.
It was time, in fact, to face them up.
Was it impulsive as hell?
Yes. Yeah, absolutely.
But that was just who I was. Much to my parents’—who worried about me constantly—chagrin.
I jumped.
Then started to look for the parachute pull on the way down.
And, yeah, a lot of the time, that pull wasn’t there. I was a professional free-faller in life. I did a good tuck and roll when I landed, trying to minimize the damage. There was always damage, though. Battle wounds and emotional scars.
That was life, though, right?
A series of missteps and punches you had to learn to roll with.
Seemed pointless to try to avoid getting hurt. It was better to just learn some first aid and develop a pretty strong pain tolerance to it all.
That said, even I was having reservations about this new plan of mine as I got a fourth cup of coffee, this time to go, and headed back out of She’s Bean Around to think it through.
I mean, what the fuck?
Was I really going to commit to something as lifelong as a damn outlaw biker patch just to face up the uglier part of my past?
I mean, granted, prospecting didn’t mean I was going to get a patch. In fact, I didn’t actuallywanta patch.
I’d never been someone who knew what they wanted to do with their life, but I was pretty sure being an arms-dealing biker wasn’t in my ten-year-plan.
That said, I could fail my way out of it. These were guys I knew, after all. They would let me out when I wanted out.
But going in and acting like it was something I wanted gave me the chance to deal with some shit.
To say my piece.
And maybe fuck with someone who’d cut me so deeply that I was pretty sure I never fully healed, that I’d been bleeding inwardly for years.
Was that the most mature and level-headed thing to do? No, of course not. But no one would ever accuse me of being level-headed.
“That is the gait of a woman up to something,” a familiar voice called as I made my way down the street, heading back toward my car that I’d parked in the community lot at the edge of the main street because I’d wanted to walk around and take in the town.
Turning, I saw a face I didn’t realize I’d missed as much as I did until I saw her again.
Lo.
The co-owner of the gym I’d practically been raised in because my parents believed to their cores that self-defense wasn’t just an option for a young woman to learn, but a necessity.
Over the years, I’d taken damn near every class she offered at the gym, learning more fighting styles than most people would ever hear of.
It had been a great outlet for a restless girl with too much of an attitude and not enough of the sense that would come with some extra years.
“Lo!” I said, giving her a genuine smile because she truly was someone who meant a lot to me.
“You look great. I didn’t hear you were back in town.”
“I just got back a couple of days ago,” I explained. “Been holed up at my parents’ place, sleeping off a little jet lag and letting them fuss over me.”