“Fucking bitch!” He staggers backward and steadies himself on the end of the bed frame, hand at his mouth.
Grabbing my jeans from the floor, I pull at the door handle with my sweating palms. Out. Get out. My bag is by the front door, if I get there first.
I’m slammed to the floor, landing face first as he tackles me from behind.
“Let me go!” I scream, immobile under his bulk and I’m rewarded by a punch to the head.
“You whore!”
Never this. He’s never been like this. But I deserve this, don’t I? I shouldn’t have lied. I made this happen. I lift my head and stare at the blood from my mouth on the white tiled floor.
I can’t move so I slump back down. Dan’s weight lifts and he pushes me onto my back, dragging my legs apart. I kick out again, my foot collides with his face, and he grabs my leg, forcing it to the floor. I don’t know this Dan; the man’s face looking back at me is contorted with a hatred I’ve never seen.
“Dan! Don’t!”
“You move and I’ll fucking kill you!”
His surety I’ll weaken at those words is his downfall because the fact I believe Dan triggers my next move. I focus on relaxing, letting him think he’s won and when Dan shifts enough to free my legs I push both knees up and slam them into his balls as hard as I can.
Dan lets out a strangled yell and falls backward to the floor, hands going to his crotch. “Fuck!” he attempts to yell, but the sound is hoarse.
I should’ve fought back weeks ago.
I pull my shaking body from the floor, grab my jeans and stagger to the front door. Blinded by the pain, I seize my bag from the hallway and crash through the front door, into the drizzling rain. Not looking back, I run barefoot to the car, as I rummage in the bag for my car keys. Climbing inside, I central-lock the doors just as Dan charges into the street. My hands tremble and I struggle to get the key in the ignition, but I’m safe.
“You can’t go! I’ll find you! I know where you’ll be!” he shouts and slams his hands on the driver’s window.
The angry mask of Dan’s face is the monster who’s held me captive, convincing me he’s the best I’d ever get. The growing realisation this isn’t true, and the increase in his physical abuse, began to break that control. This last attempt at violating me and breaking the frightened girl for good is just that. His last.
Focusing the rationality I have left, I manage to start the car and. Dan steps to one side as I rev the engine; he’s no longer in control now there’s a ton of metal between us. Slamming my foot on the accelerator, I drive.
For an hour, the rain on the windscreen and tears fight over which blurs my vision the most. I swallow down the urge to vomit, tasting the blood from my injured mouth, and focus on the road as I squint at the headlights beaming from cars travelling toward me on the opposite side of the road.
I can’t go to Jax. Dan will come for me.
I drive for another half hour. Rain. Tears. Pain.
Fear.
A lurching realisation.
I have nowhere. Nobody.