Chapter Nine
“Someone’s watching?” Bambi whispers.
I pause mid thrust and turn my head as something thumps on the floor. “What the fuck,” I mutter as I pull out and roll off the bed. I grab my jeans tugging them up as I move to the door. Shards of glass are splintered in the entryway from a picture frame. I pick up the frame and know the second my eyes take in the black and white portrait of myself leaning against the back of the clubhouse. Kimber. I felt her focus on me as she snapped pictures but pretended not to notice. She does that often. Takes pictures when she thinks no one is paying attention to her. I toss the frame and photo into a nearby chair and step over the glass. At the stairwell I find Viking embracing Kimber as she sobs uncontrollably.
I owe her an explanation. I thought I could avoid doing this, but the sound of her wailing nearly slices me in two. The guttural moan that leaves her lips as her body shakes, I feel like I’ve earned the title of Royal Bastard. It’s better this way that she thinks I’m a fuckin’ monster. A devil not worthy of redemption. I can’t earn my patch and worry about someone using her innocence as a weapon against me. The moment anyone finds your weakness that’s it. It’s game over. I won’t see her soul tainted because she wants to be tied to me. I need Bambi to trust me. I can’t afford to let personal shit get in the way. Prez is counting on me to find the answers he seeks.
“Kimber?” Fuck. I hate this. I know what I’m about to do is going to break her spirit, but it has to happen.
“Asshole,” Viking barks at me. Something tells me he knows that I could put a stop to her pain yet choose to hurt her deeper. I’ll deal with him later. He understands better than anyone that the club comes first.
They exchange low spoken words, and he shoves past me, giving me a warning that he has no problem putting his fist in my face if I do more damage to Kimber. Brother can get in line behind Link, because once he finds out he’s gonna want to do what he’s known for. Hooking chains around throats and dragging the body behind his motorcycle.
Once we’re alone she shoots off at the mouth about Bambi and I’m reminded that she’s waiting in my bed, and I need to make this quick.
“You’re a little girl who has no fucking clue who I am or what I’m like. You got a crush and that’s real cute, sweetheart, but a man like me needs a woman in my bed who knows how to take care of my dick. I don’t need to teach some brat how to suck my cock.” The vile words burn like acid on my tongue. I should have a care with how I’m speaking to her but the more hate that burns inside her where I’m concerned the better off she’ll be.
“I know you think about me. That you care about me. So you can fuck your strippers or whores. Whoever you want but know I can too. I can march down these stairs and have my pick.”
The muscle in my jaw tenses as I grind my teeth. That attitude she’s throwing around only makes me want to shove her against the wall and claim her, but I can’t. “You want to be used then be my guest. See how far you get when your uncle sees you acting like a cut slut.”
“I’ll take my chances.”
The thought of her with any member of the club cuts me to the bone. I shouldn’t allow myself to care. I dig my fingers into her upper arm a little harder and rougher than I probably should. Deep enough to leave a mark but I’m hanging by a thread here. It kills me that’s the only mark of mine she’ll ever have. If I’m successful in making her hate me though at least I won’t have to watch her with someone else.
I drag her up a few stairs to the landing and back her into a corner on the verge of losing control.
“When I kiss other guys, I pretend that they’re you.” Her finger moves along my lips tracing every groove. “I imagine how hot it’d be when you sink inside me.”
Fuck me. Her words shoot straight to my dick, and I see it in my head. Her beneath me, ripe and ready. Her soft and wet taking my cock rough and hard. The night I had her in my bed nearly did me in. I lose control and claim those sweet lips I’ve dreamt of every night since. Kimber kisses me as though she can’t get enough. Her fingers thread through my hair at the nape of my neck, as I deepen the kiss. I sink my teeth into her bottom lip and suck the swollen skin before releasing her. Her gorgeous green eyes ringed with brown and flecked with gold stare at me with such hope and love reminding me that this can’t happen.
“Don’t come around me anymore,” I tell her as my heart thumps wildly in my chest in protest. One taste of her and I want to say fuck it and walk away from it all if it means in the end, I have Kimber. I was so damn close to having it all.
“What?”
I pull a breath through my nose and deep into my lungs to deliver the final blow. “That kiss just now. I felt nothing. Now you know. I don’t see you as anything but a girl.” The words sound as though they are being spoken by a stranger. It fucking guts me to treat her this way, but I’d rather she hates me then get caught up in this mess more than she already is. I should have handled this sooner.
She shoves at me on the verge of crying again. “You feel something for me but you’re a coward.”
I step back because there’s nothing more to say. She’s right. I’m terrified that she’ll get in the line of fire because of her connection to me. I know I’m playing a dangerous game. Bad people are involved in this Cloud Nine shit, and someone will get hurt. People are dying and I’ll be damned if Kimber will be a victim in this drug and turf war.
I’m a selfish bastard who doesn’t deserve her because I didn’t want to disappoint the club.
Viking comes back down the stairs and Kimber steps in front of him. I’m sure she wants him to give her a ride out of here. Far away from me. I need him to get her out of here before I blow everything I’m working toward to hell and take her right here.
I watch as she grabs him by his cut and goes up on her toes and fucking kisses him after her tongue was just down my throat. What the fuck is happening.
“I can have my pick.” Her words ring in my head like a broken fuckin’ record. What did I just set in motion?
He grips her ass, and her legs go around his waist. I can’t fucking watch and yet I’m planted to the spot unable to look away.