Chapter 10
Several weeks pass and no matter how hard it is for me to grasp, I know that I am solely to blame for losing Jonathan. He came back for me, and I couldn’t see that I had the opportunity of a lifetime. I should have taken it. Instead, I let it pass me by and made things even worse for both of us. The knock on my door almost goes unnoticed as I am deep in thought but when it gets a little louder, I shoot up and so does my heart rate.
I swing the door wide and fall into his arms, craving his warm embrace. He wraps his arms around me, holding me in for an eternity before he gently pulls me away to look into my eyes.
“You’ve lost weight,” he says, concern lacing his warm tone.
“Will you come in?” I whisper, thinking that if he denies me again, I might as well shrivel up and die.
I brace myself for his reply and when the words “I will,” reach my ears, I reach up to plant a soft kiss on his cheek.
He takes a seat near the window and I crouch down in front of his legs, taking both of his hands in mine and speaking before he does because my heart will burst if I don’t. “I’m sorry for everything that’s happened, J. It was all my fault and I never should have agreed to put you through that.”
He remains calm and I feel like the storm has passed. “It was my fault, just the same, Miranda. We both went in knowing it might break us. I won’t allow Sebastian that satisfaction.”
I move closer and fall into his lap, desperate for the man who’s had my heart since we were little kids and when he lowers to meet my lips, relief consumes me whole.
He holds me in his arms and his kisses consume me. It’s as if we have turned back into those kids we once were, our first time all over again. I pull back after a while and look into his face, studying the man in front of me, and his next words leave me breathless.
“I want to make love to you, Miranda. I need to be inside you again. Just you and me.”
My heart soars, flying high into the sunlit sky and I find myself whispering the words I’ve practiced saying a hundred times over since he left. “I am yours, Jonathan. I’ve always been yours. You never lost me.”
And then, a few, short moments later, I take him inside my body again and let him cleanse me of all my past mistakes. All the dirtiness and filth of my past profession. I let him love me the way he wants, and I’m elated for him treating me with care and respect instead of contempt and disregard. I let myself soak in the intimate moments with him, and when I finally reach my climax, it’s his name on my lips and a single tear I quickly wipe away that instigates his own release.
***
That same night after we eat dinner, and with me dozing in front of the telly, cocooned safely in his arms, he reaches for something, unsettling me, and then his deep voice fills my ears.
“Open your eyes, baby.”
When I do he holds out a tiny box and I can’t believe my eyes as I try to push the drowsiness of sleep away.
“Will you marry me, Miranda Michaels?”
I sit up and turn to look at his beautiful brown eyes as he patiently waits for my response.
“Are you fucking kidding me, J?” I swear, my emotions suddenly running high.
“Is that a yes, then?” he nervously laughs and I give him my warmest smile and my longest kiss.
“That’s a definite yes, Mr. Sullivan. I’ll be honored to become your wife,” I whisper after our lips part and it’s his turn to smile.
I hold out my hand and he slides the ring onto my finger. It fits perfectly.
“Good. You certainly have made things interesting for me, lately,” he teases and I know exactly what he’s talking about.
“Baby, I swear things are going to get a lot duller and pretty mundane from now on,” I sass, humor and lightheartedness finally making an appearance in our lives.
“Is that right, Mrs. Sullivan? How about if things got a little interesting right now?”
“I wouldn’t have the slightest clue as to what you’re referring to, fiancé,” I tease and he shows me just what he plans for me as he takes my hand, with his ring on it, and places it atop his crotch.
“Ah-huh! You dirty, dirty man,” I say, giggling as he sweeps me off my feet and throws me onto the bed where he makes me whisper his name time and time again until there’s no room for any other thought than him.