Chapter 1
My mind is reeling as we step into the elevator that quickly moves us directly to my penthouse apartment. I rummage in my purse for my keys for the longest time and when I finally fish them out, I stick them in the lock and walk inside, him on my tail.
“How’d you find where I lived, J? I never told you that.”
“You left your name and address at the nearby church, for your grandmother's services, remember? I had to sneak behind your back, otherwise, it wouldn’t be a surprise.”
“I see. You want a drink? I sure could use one right now.”
“Sure,” he says, scanning the apartment from corner to corner. “I like what you’ve done with this place. Looks very cozy.”
I walk back to him, hand him a glass of chilled red wine and take the seat next to him. “Thanks. I like the peace here. Excuse me just one sec, okay? I need to let Josh know I’ve made it back safely. He gets antsy when he doesn’t hear back from me after my dates.”
He takes a long sip, then his eyes meet mine. “Don’t mind me, then.”
I speed-dial Josh and after telling him I’ve made it back in one piece, I hang up the phone a moment later.
“Miranda…” he starts and I am excited and afraid about what his next words are going to be. “May I ask who this man is?”
“Josh is the man who’s looking out for me. I don’t even know if I’d have made it as far if it wasn’t for his help.”
He swallows hard at my words and I brace myself for the questions I feel brewing inside his head. “Is he your lover, too?”
I look straight into his eyes when I answer, I have no intention of lying or sugar coating any of the things I’ve done while at work. “He was. But not anymore. He’s in a committed relationship with someone now.”
He simply nods, then utters his next words that have my world reeling. “I’ve decided to leave the Church, Miranda. I want to give our relationship a chance if you’d still have me.”
“Oh my God, Jonathan, are you serious? So, this is not a friendly visit?” I say, stunned that he would even think of leaving the Church after he spent his entire life under oath.
“Yes,” he says, his voice now low and even. “Your last visit made me think about things differently.” He takes another sip while still looking at me. “I realized that my life is not how I’ve imagined it. Seeing you again after all this time brought back all the feelings I had for you. Feelings that I’d buried deep after we parted ways.”
“You decided to leave now? After all these years of being a Priest? But why now, Jonathan?” I mumble, still stunned at his sudden change of heart. His mere presence here, sitting right in front of me is unnerving. I force a smile but he sees right through it.
“Why not now? I thought you'd be happy to see me.”
“See you, yes. I just didn't expect you to drop this bomb on me, that's all.”
"Well, I’m not sorry I did. Things change, Miranda. My sister came by to visit me a couple of days after you left. You’ve never met her. She’s just been diagnosed with a rare form of leukemia. We had a long conversation and I told her about your recent visit. She reminded me that life’s way too short not to follow what your heart desires most.” He takes a long pause, another sip of his wine, and continues. “That was the turning point for me, I guess. Seeing Mary again, hearing about her news, and thinking of you. I realized I had been following my mind all my life. Not anymore, Miranda."
He reaches out and takes my hand in his, squeezing tightly and I somehow feel ashamed. Unworthy. And confused as hell.
“From now on I’m going to follow my heart. And my heart wants you.” A deep sigh leaves my lips and he looks deep into my eyes. His discomfort is evident in the tone of his voice and I’ve never seen him unsettled like this before.
Although, I have to wonder how he’d react if he knew that I have the cum of three men dripping out of me as we speak and that I’ve just had my first sexual experience with a woman. Maybe now is not the right time to tell him all the intimate details of my work life.
“I’m sorry to hear about your sister, J. Life’s damn hard, I’ll tell you that. I hope she’ll get better soon.”
“I hope so too. I strongly believe in the power of prayer,” he says, then notices me fidgeting in my seat. “Did I come at a bad time? Were you planning on going out again?” he adds a second later.
“No, I just got back after a very long weekend. I am knackered.”
“I can imagine,” is all he says, refusing to look at me, and my nerves suddenly get the best of me.
“Can you? I mean, can you really imagine, Jonathan? Do you have any idea of all the nasty, degrading, utterly humiliating things I do and have done to me?”
That shuts him up, just like I intended, but not for long. “You think I don’t know what those men do to you, Miranda? Or what your work entails? Please don’t insult my intelligence like this, baby. I’m a grown man. I know about the sins of the flesh.”
I can’t help but scoff at his last phrase, the look in his eyes one I've never seen before. “The sins of the flesh? That’s what you call them? It seems rather childish, don’t you think?” I take a deep breath, then slowly exhale before I hit him with the truth about my world again.