But need and want were two very different things.
Gemma opened her mouth to say something, probably to deny that she liked kissing me back, because I had a feeling she was going through the same emotions in her head, but the door to the dining hall creaked open, and she gasped. “Shh,” I hushed over her lips that were still hovering over mine. “We’re fine. Stay quiet.”
Fuck, I wanted to kiss her again. And touch her.
A few moments passed before Gemma’s mouth moved over my ear. “Why…” She spoke so low I could hardly hear her. “Why do I feel like laughing?”
My lips twitched as my hand slowly cupped the back of her head to keep her still. “Because deep down you like breaking rules with me. It’s fun.”
The softest, throaty noise left her, and she let out a soft giggle. Oh, shit. “Gemma,” I warned, also feeling a laugh bubble up in my chest. I saw the sway of light from a flashlight as the dining hall door shut loudly. Whoever was patrolling the halls tonight was suspicious, and I had a big feeling it was someone on the SMC, because why wouldn’t it be with us shoved underneath a table in the middle of the night? Part of me wondered if I should have just let us get caught and tell the duty teacher that Gemma and I were walking back from tutoring, but it was late, we were far from the library, and I wasn’t done with her yet. I didn’t want the night to end.
Gemma’s body started to shake on mine as she buried her head into my chest, holding back a laugh. I cursed the fact that we had to be quiet, because I wanted to hear her laugh again. It erased some of the darkness that rested inside me. Like a soothing balm. And I liked the fact that she wasn’t panicking like earlier. Did she finally trust me and believe that I wouldn’t let her get into trouble?
The light grew closer, and although Gemma’s giggles were as quiet as a mouse, a small fraction of reality set in. We couldn’t get caught. Even with my grades improving, mainly because I actually turned in my assignments now, I still needed to keep my nose clean. My grades would simply pacify the SMC, maybe sharpen their trust a little, but if I got caught sneaking out again, or alone with a girl shoved underneath a table in the dining hall at midnight—if I got caught breaking any rules, really—I would find my ticket out of here.
Gemma was still shaking on me, and her grip on my hoodie had tightened. Fucking shit, Gemma. I wanted to laugh just at the mere fact that she was laughing, but instead, I pushed my hips up and gained her attention. Then, I peeled her head from my chest and smacked my lips onto hers so hard it silenced every bit of laughter that was hanging on her tongue. It only took her a second to move past the shock and begin kissing me back, and although I kept my eyes open, watching the beam of light sway from one end of the dining hall to the next, the heat and intensity that her mouth caused on mine was electric. My hips moved, and Gemma’s legs fell to the side slowly, letting my hardness touch her warm core, and Christ, I could feel the hot heat sourcing from the only piece of fabric that covered her. My hands gripped her hips to keep her steady so she wouldn’t move over my jeans. The scratching noise would only bring more attention to us, and that was the last thing we needed.
Our lips moved in sync with each other, and Gemma must have caught the hint that we needed to be quiet, because there wasn’t a single sound of smacked lips. Our kiss wasn’t sloppy. Or rushed. It was slow, intense, and hot as hell.
As soon as the door slammed shut again and the beam of light was gone, Gemma pulled herself from my mouth. My hand left her waist, and I brought it up to my lips, telling her to be quiet. She nodded, and a piece of her hair fell forward, landing on my shoulder. The muscles in my neck stretched as I inclined my head and searched through the darkened floor to see if anyone was still standing there. I felt Gemma suck in more air. My hips had pressed up in the action, and she and I were like one. We were so close I could feel the burning throb all the way to my soul.
My eyes clung to hers, and for a second, we just stared at each other, eyes locked, bodies joined. Her chest had risen and stayed, her grip on my shirt never lessening. I gulped down a hot swallow, and then at the exact same time, our lips crashed together again, and our slow and steady kiss from earlier turned vicious and unforgiving. I didn’t hold back this time. My hands were on her bare ass, the fabric of her panties bunching as I squeezed. Her hips moved over mine as if she knew exactly what she was doing. I suppressed a grunt and felt the need to growl as I nipped her lip with my teeth. We were moving so fucking fast I didn’t have time to even ask if this was what she wanted. If we were going to go down this path, the one where we shared nothing but intense kisses and lustful touches, we were both going to go down afterwards. There was likely to be guilt, maybe even regret.
No. I would never regret kissing her. It was too hot and too pleasing.
I broke our kiss as I pushed us back out from under the dining table, allowing the open air to cool our heated bodies. As soon as we were on our feet, I picked her up underneath her skirt and placed her firm ass down on the slab of wood where we placed our trays for every meal, and then I shoved her legs apart.
“I told myself I wouldn’t cross this line with you,” I muttered through clenched teeth as her hands laid on my shoulders. “But then we kissed.”
“And things changed,” she finished, wiggling herself up to be closer to me. Our gazes met, and the air shifted. The truth was evident in her eyes. The same truth that I had. We both knew that this was something much more than a simple touch, and that it was something that would likely punish us in the end, but it didn’t matter—at least not to me.
I wanted nothing more than her at that moment.
“Do you want to cross that line?” I asked, tipping her head back with the pad of my finger. Her long hair fell behind her shoulders, showcasing her rising chest.
She glanced at my lips. “I don’t know what the line is…but I think I want to cross it with you.” She swallowed quietly. “I told you earlier that I wanted you to teach me how to feel good, and that hasn’t changed.”
My one hand stayed on her delicate chin as she looked up at me with curious eyes. Her body language spoke volumes. The arousal radiated off her so strongly I could hardly focus on anything other than my own racing pulse. The innocent part of her was evident within her gaze, and I wanted nothing more than to take that innocent piece of her and distort it until she was fully fucked and unrecognizable. She was going to know what it felt like to be pleasured and treated like nothing less than a goddamn queen.
“The lesson is long,” I started, gripping her knee that had somehow clenched around my hip. “But we’ll start at the beginning.” A rush of breath left her as my hand trailed up her leg and past the hem of her skirt. I watched as she squirmed under my touch and how her eyes darted away.
“Look at me,” I pleaded, gripping her chin again. Once our gazes were joined again, my hand crept up a little higher. “It’s okay to feel good, Gemma. If it doesn’t feel good, then you deserve better.”
A ragged, nervous breath left her mouth. “I was told that this was wrong…what you’re doing to me…what I’m feeling.”
My fingers stilled for a single second as I filed that little piece away for later. “They lied.”
My other hand, the one on her chin, brushed over her slick, bottom lip, and I fought myself when I pictured devouring her mouth again. If I were kissing her, then I wouldn’t see the wild hunger on her face as I dipped a finger into her. I wanted to watch her come undone. I wanted to be responsible for the flush on her cheeks.
Her eyes dipped as my hand reached the side of her panties. Her chest heaved. Her back bowed. Her h
air flung out of her face, and the subtle moonlight shined directly onto her high cheekbones. Goddamn, she was fucking beautiful. Achingly so. It almost hurt to look at her.
As soon as I hooked a finger inside her panties, she shuddered. So responsive. “Isaiah,” she whispered, peering up at me with wide eyes. She was already so fucking wet. My finger ran down her slick seam, and she whimpered. I couldn’t believe no one had touched her before. Had they touched her before? A raging dose of jealousy clawed at my back. I couldn’t fathom anyone else watching this. I wanted her to be mine. The nerves were intensified in my stomach, and the overpowering protectiveness over her was coming alive in my very being as I stared down at her. “You’re fucking beautiful, Gemma.” I circled her clit gently, hardly keeping a hold on my steady pace. Rushing this wouldn’t be smart. I wanted her to trust me with her body.
“It feels…” Ragged breaths left her as her cheeks darkened.
“Good,” I whispered along her lips before I kissed her breathless. Her tongue caressed mine like it was pleading for something, and that was when I pushed the very tip of my finger into her tight, wet folds.